And It's On, Again
by Nanashio
Summary: Same rating, since I'm cautious. More or less a sequel. Shounen-ai. Trowa and Wufei have a weird mission.
1. Her Return?

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or the characters... no matter how much I pleaded, I still don't get a piece of the franchise... ah well, maybe if me and my friends chip in, then I can buy them..!!!  
  
Nanashi's Friends: we don't even watch Gundam Wing!  
  
Nanashi: yeah... you're so cheap...  
  
Nanashi's Friends: shaddup..! *snickers*  
  
Nanashi: *grins*  
  
Warnings: er, no idea yet... first chaper gets up, then maybe I can figure out what the warning's oughta be... *grins* but shounen-ai, definitely *nods, enthusiastically*  
  
Oh yeah, KuriQuinn, thanks for your review... sorry, I had to fix a few errors ^^() but I want you to know, I appreciate it... thanks... and sorry again... oh yeah, sheep are cool!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A new mansion. Heero Yuy officially declared Duo as his own. How? Let's let the readers decide on that. [A/N: *snickers* think what you want... I did]  
  
And Duo Maxwell was in an exceptionally good mood. Quatre Winner noted this, as he relaxed peacefully in the livingroom, reading and enjoying his tea.  
  
"WU-CHAN!!!"  
  
WHUMP!  
  
THUD!  
  
CRASH!  
  
"KISAMA! WHAT'RE YOU DOING, MAXWELL!?!?"  
  
"IT'S A NICE DAY! THE PERFECT DAY FOR GLOMPING..!  
  
"Glomping?"  
  
"You dunno what glomping is..?" Duo asked, sounding shocked.  
  
"No, I don't... now get off of me! I don't have a deathwish..!"  
  
"Aww, relax, Wu-chan... Hee-chan stopped doing all that, a long time ago..."  
  
"It was 3 weeks ago, Maxwell..."  
  
"See, it was a long time ago..."  
  
"Even so... get off!"  
  
Then the sounds of a struggle was heard.  
  
THUMP!  
  
"Whoa..!"  
  
"Hn... sorry, Maxwell."  
  
Then quick running footsteps. Wufei Chang's. Quatre couldn't help but laugh, softly. Since they left their last mansion, things were much more light-hearted.  
  
Then more running footsteps. Duo's. Quatre lowered his novel, and tilted his head to hear better. Duo had another target in sight.  
  
"HEY TRO-KUN..!"  
  
WHUMP!  
  
THUD!  
  
"Duo..!" then a confused pause. "You do know you're sitting on me, don't you?"  
  
"Yup..."  
  
"Mind telling me why?"  
  
"It's the perfect day for glomping..!"  
  
"You said that yesterday... and the day before that, and the day before that one..."  
  
"Okay, so it's the perfect week for glomping..."  
  
"Incidentally, I call this tackling, not glomping..."  
  
"Your point?"  
  
"I looked it up... and this isn't glomping..."  
  
"Well, what's your view on a glomp then..?"  
  
Quatre snickered, Trowa Barton was a lot more argumentive, too. He had the tendency to start more arguments with Duo, simply because he enjoyed it.  
  
Heero strolled into the livingroom, glancing at Quatre, "where's Duo..?" he asked, Quatre smiled, and gestured upwards. Heero furrowed his brow, and tilted his head to listen.  
  
"I consider a glomp to be when a person jumps on another person, arms around the neck, legs around the waist..."  
  
"What're you implying..?" Duo asked, with an amused tone.  
  
"Not funny... and what you did was a tackle... I am on the floor..."  
  
"Is that bad?"  
  
"It is if you were trying to glomp me, this is a tackle, Duo... glomping involves some clinging too..." Trowa replied, sounding oddly patient.  
  
"Yeah, well, I'm sitting on you, how clingy is that..?"  
  
"Not clingy enough... g' off..."  
  
Heero glanced at Quatre, who was laughing softly into his hand. "Sorry, Heero... try to stay calm, okay?"  
  
Heero shrugged, and sat down, grabbing the remote control, "I'm fine, Quatre..."  
  
"Hey! I know who I never glomped, slash, tackled yet..!" Duo said, cheerfully. Then he was off and running down the hall again. A few minutes later, Trowa entered the livingroom. He froze, seeing Heero sitting on the sofa, casually flipping through the channels.  
  
"Uhhh..."  
  
"I'm fine, Trowa... in or out..?" Heero asked, calmly, as he stopped on a news channel. Trowa gulped as he slowly made his way in, and sat rigidly in an easy chair.  
  
Quatre laughed, and went back to reading.  
  
"Hey Cat..?" Duo called, sounding very friendly. That wasn't a good sign.  
  
"Uhh, what is it, Duo?" Quatre called back, looking over his shoulder, seeing the braided American, he was wearing a wide, mischievious grin.  
  
"C' mere..." he said, beckoning the Arabian with his finger.  
  
Quatre forced a polite smile, "I'm busy at the moment..." he said, slowly.  
  
"Awww, c' mon Cat... it'll be okay, seriously... c' mere..." Duo coaxed.  
  
Quatre swallowed nervously, and glanced at Trowa for help. The silent pilot merely held up his hands and shook his head, in a 'you're on your own' gesture. Quatre glanced at Heero, seeing that he was smiling, slightly as he watched the news.  
  
Grimacing, Quatre closed his novel over a bookmark as he got up and headed towards Duo, who was now calling him from the kitchen.  
  
"What'd I do to deserve this..?" Quatre thought, glumly.  
  
Trowa raised an eyebrow, then he glanced at Heero, seeing the Japanese pilot was actually biting his lip, so he wouldn't laugh.  
  
"Duo? What is it..?"  
  
WHUMP!  
  
THUD!  
  
"ACK..!"  
  
Duo laughed in triumph, "hah! Got all four of you...!"  
  
"You didn't tackle Heero..!"  
  
"Yeah, I did..."  
  
"No, you didn't..."  
  
"I did it this morning..."  
  
A small awkward pause.  
  
"What?" Duo asked, confused.  
  
"What... uhhh, did Heero hurt you, or anything..?"  
  
Trowa and Heero could practically HEAR the blush Quatre was starting to take on.  
  
"Not really... it just kind of lead to other... uhh, things..." Duo said, slowly.  
  
Trowa blinked, then he glanced at Heero, who was ignoring him, staring intently at the TV. Trowa grinned, "Heero..."  
  
"Not a word, Trowa..." Heero said, calmly, as his face slowly started to redden. Trowa snickered, then nodded and kept quiet.  
  
***  
  
After a few moment, Quatre and Duo returned to the livingroom, Quatre took his spot back on the sofa, by shoving Trowa off of the sofa. Resulting in the very amusing scene of Trowa flailing his arms, in a vain attempt to stay put.  
  
THUMP! With no success.  
  
Duo flopped down, between Heero and Quatre.  
  
"Watch something better, Hee-chan..." Duo said, impatiently.  
  
"Hn..."  
  
"Awww, man, you're starting all that again..?" Duo said, with a roll of his eyes.  
  
"I'm waiting for something..."  
  
Duo grinned, "that's better..."  
  
"... and the pilot of the helicopter says it was the 'big yellow canary-like bird' that threw them off course... but other then that, he and his passengers are all fine, recovering in the local hospital ..." the preppy woman on the screen said, smiling at the camera. Then she turned to look at the other camera. Which was strange, since she was supposed to be looking at the 'other' other camera.  
  
Duo laughed hysterically. Trowa snickered, while Quatre tried to look sympathetic, but it was amusing, so he started to laugh as well. Heero grinned, you could always tell the rookies.  
  
And to make it even more funny, she actually kept talking.  
  
After a few seconds, she realized her bearings were wrong and spun around, hastily.  
  
"Oh my god... I'm sorry... I just... er, what? Keep going? But I made a fool of myself... it's live..!?" she squeaked. Duo laughed harder, tears streaming down his cheeks.  
  
"Let's watch this more often, Hee-chan..!"  
  
Heero smiled, "hn..."  
  
"Ahem..!" She cleared her throat, loudly, and quickly composed herself.  
  
"In other news... the former Queen of the World, Relena Peacecraft, has been found. She's been reported missing approximately two weeks ago... the authorities began to fear the worst, until Pagen, Relena's faithful manservant revealed the situation... what? manservant isn't allowed..?"  
  
Duo was clutching at his stomach, sinking low into the sofa, laughing so hard, he could barely breathe. "Man servant..!?!?" he choked out, sending into fresh peals of laughter.  
  
Quatre was covering his mouth to stifle his laughter. Trowa shared Duo's enthusiasm, as he pounded on the floor, laughing hysterically.  
  
Heero chuckled, then glared lightly at Duo and Trowa, "stop... funny as it is, it's still news..." he pointed out. Duo and Trowa both nodded, and tried to quiet down.  
  
"We now go live, to where Relena Peacecraft has been found..."  
  
The perky,(and hilarious) woman disappeared from the screen, revealing... the same newslady again, prancing around her dressing room, singing, at the top of her lungs.  
  
"Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those peepers..? Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those eyes..?"[1]  
  
There went Heero's self-control. He started laughing hysterically, leaning on Duo for support. Not much help, since Duo was laughing so hard, he fell over, leaning on Quatre. The Arabian didn't mind. He couldn't. This whole ordeal was hilarious, and he was now laughing just as hard as the other three pilots.  
  
The scene disappeared, going back to the amusing newsanchor, who was now red as a beet. "I can't work like this..!" she screeched. "PUT ON THE REAL THING..!"  
  
She began breathing, raggedly, obviously pretty close to losing the last ounce of her composure that was keeping her from strangling the cameraman, or something.  
  
She vanished again, revealing the Gundam Pilot's former mansion. The laughter stopped abruptly, as they all sat up. Trowa raised an eyebrow, seeing Relena Peacecraft being lead down the front steps, wrapped in a blanket.  
  
"They just found her?" Duo asked in shock.  
  
"Hn..."  
  
"You think she's okay...?" Quatre asked, concerned.  
  
"If she was declaring herself 'shinny-game-ee'... she should be fine..." Trowa said with a shrug.  
  
"Relena, miss Relena..? Can you answer some questions for us..?" the reporters were calling.  
  
"Rusty Bumper, from the local press... who are you, and where are you going?"[2]  
  
"Do your research, Rusty..!"[3] another reporter scoffed. "Wolf Howler, from the Bugle... Miss Relena, is there a reason you're here at this particular mansion?  
  
"They're in the mansion... they're in there... my, but they're good at hiding... they must all play hide and seek all the time..." Relena was mumbling, as she played with the end of her messy 'Duo-braid'. She was rocking back and forth a bit. Her voice was raspy, too.  
  
"Probably from the stupid thing she kept saying over and over, when we were there..." Duo thought, with a shake of his head.  
  
The other Gundam pilots watching eyes were widened in shock. Relena must have gone crazy, being alone for that long.  
  
"She was in there for three weeks!?" Quatre gasped.  
  
Wufei strolled into the livingroom, "just had to see what was so funny..." then he paused, seeing Relena on TV, "hmph, haven't seen her in a while... where is she now? Moscow? France? America?"  
  
"She's where we left her..." Trowa answered slowly.  
  
Wufei raised an eyebrow, "the mansion..?"  
  
The four other pilots nodded.  
  
Wufei blinked, then he started to laugh hysterically. He fell over, pounding on the floor, laughing as if there were no tomorrow.  
  
Then the camera quickly focused on an elderly man with bushy eyebrows and a white mustache. The reporters rushed to him.  
  
"Pagen! Mr. Pagen!? Can you tell us why Miss Relena is here, at this mansion?" several of the reporters yelled.  
  
"She was at this mansion, in search of her true love... at least that's what she said to me.. "don't do it" I said... but that's Relena for you..."  
  
"Who is this particular true love?" one of the many reporters asked.  
  
Duo narrowed his eyes, Heero smiled and grabbed Duo's hand, the braided boy blinked, then smiled.  
  
"She said two particular names... Heero Yuy, and Duo Maxwell... I'm not sure which held her particular interest."  
  
Heero jumped to his feet, "what?!?!" he snarled at the TV.  
  
"Easy, Hee-chan..." Duo said, sitting the pilot back down.  
  
Wufei just pulled himself back up, behind the sofa, still grinning with amusement. Trowa sighed, while Quatre shook his head. Relena was going to try and complicate things, again?  
  
"Miss Relena... any last words..!?" One of the reporters asked.  
  
Relena looked around, then focused on this TV station's particular camera. She grinned, menacingly.  
  
"I'll know where you are... I will find you... then you will be mine..!" she hissed.  
  
Duo felt a shiver run through him, Quatre grabbed Duo's sleeve, in fear.  
  
Heero narrowed his eyes, as he squeezed Duo's hand assuringly. Then he glared at the Relena on the screen. "I dare you..." he said, darkly.  
  
Trowa grabbed the remote and clicked the power button, turning the TV off.  
  
Wufei raised an eyebrow, "I guess all that time in that mansion, alone, can take it's toll on you..." he said, slowly.  
  
The others nodded slowly, in agreement.  
  
***  
  
Back at the Sanq Kingdom, Relena was now safe at home. The reporters were calling her non-stop. But that wasn't her concern. Her concern was aimed to a messy, brown-haired boy with beautiful deep, prussian blue eyes. And another oddly attractive boy, with a long chestnut brown braid with blue-violet eyes who stole his heart! And from her, no less!  
  
"Miss Relena... you have a visitor..." Pagen said, gently.  
  
"Is it who I called..?" Relena asked, as she stared hard at the floor.  
  
"No... we still haven't found him..."  
  
"Then no visitors..." she hissed.  
  
"She just wants to offer you her sympathies..." Pagen said, calmly.  
  
"Fine..."  
  
Relena looked up, seeing a short girl with short black hair, and stunning blue eyes.  
  
Hilde Schbeiker.  
  
"Hi Relena... how're you feeling?" she said, cheerfully.  
  
Relena narrowed her eyes, "have you seen Heero?" was her first question.  
  
"Huh? heh, still obsessing over him, I see..."  
  
"Hmph... like you stopped obsessing over Duo..." Relena retorted. Hilde frowned slightly.  
  
"That's none of your concern..." she snapped.  
  
Before Relena could give another comeback. She thought for a moment. Hilde had resources. Hilde was a former soldier, after all.  
  
"Hmmmm..."  
  
Hilde glared at Relena, "here I am, concerned for your health... possibly your mental health... and what do you do? Insult me..! That's rude, Miss Peaceraft... and since you have no need for company who doesn't have 'bluest of blue eyes', then I guess I'll be on my way..!" she whirled on her heel and started for the door.  
  
"Wait..!" Relena called after her.  
  
Hilde paused, and glanced over her shoulder, "what?"  
  
Relena smirked, almost evilly.  
  
"I have a proposition for you..."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
[1] not my song... it's just funny *grins and shrugs* to me anyways...  
  
[2 & 3] something from the Simpsons... it's not mine, either... heh, I just found that reporter funny ^^()  
  
Anyways... so far so good..? Hope so... I still have no idea what do with... but hey, as long as it's good, then I'll get more of an idea as I go along, right? ^_^ right... I think .() 


	2. Her Arrival

Disclaimer: the show, the boys and all other characters aren't mine... *blinks as she's being told to be more specific* but they know who I'm talking... *gets threatened with THE foam bat* ack..! Gundam Wing! Gundam Wing and the characters aren't mine!!!  
  
Warnings: hmmmmmm... still no idea... evil Relena is all I can offer... sorry *shrugs* oh yeah, shounen-ai, too... I'd say yaoi... but, uhhh... Quatre says I'm not allowed *grins and shrugs*  
  
Oh yeah, thanks to Lilly for giving me this idea *bows in thanks* thank you for sharing your idea ^_^  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Quatre glanced at the clock again. Nearly 1 am. And not one of the other pilots wanted to sleep.  
  
"Relena's threat really put us all on edge..." Quatre thought. But he couldn't help but smile. As edgy as Duo was, he still leaned peacefully on Heero, trying to fight off his obvious need for sleep.  
  
"Go to sleep, Duo..." Heero said, gently.  
  
"Nn-nn... you can't fight her off alone..." Duo said, with a yawn.  
  
Quatre yawned himself, and leaned back. Relena was halfway around the world. Yet there they all were, sitting in their spacious living room, waiting for the worst.  
  
Then there was a small sound, like something hitting the floor.  
  
All five of the pilots jumped up. Heero, Duo and Trowa had their guns drawn, aiming at the point of sound, the sofa. Wufei stood, in his fighting stance, his katana at the ready. Quatre sighed and crept over to the sofa, and knelt on it, glancing over the back.  
  
"It's just your hat, Duo..." he informed them, as he held up the black cap for emphasis.  
  
All four of them released a collective sigh of relief, and then they all sat back down.  
  
Quatre started to laugh.  
  
"What's so funny?" Trowa asked.  
  
"You guys..." the Arabian responded, covering his mouth with his hand to soften his laughter.  
  
"And how're we amusing?" Wufei asked, frowning slightly.  
  
"We were the most feared enemy OZ had ever had to deal with, and now you're all on edge because of one, as Wufei would put it... 'onna'?"  
  
"Hey, you're nervous too, Cat... admit it..." Duo pointed out.  
  
Quatre smiled, "true... but I'm not the one ready to blow a hole into something..."  
  
"That's a sick joke, Quatre..." Heero said, dryly.  
  
Quatre blinked, confused, then he turned red.  
  
The others started to laugh hysterically.  
  
"Alright, I'll admit we are being a bit paranoid... but why shouldn't we be..?" Duo asked, once their laughter died down. Then he sat down, and out his feet up on the coffee table.  
  
"I agree with Maxwell..." Wufei said, calmly.  
  
"You guys must be forgetting, Relena's pretty far off... and if she were to arrive, her first priority would probably be to sleep..."  
  
"Why is that?" Heero asked, frowning slightly.  
  
"Simply put, Relena wouldn't want to present herself to the One and Only with saddlebags under her eyes..." Trowa said, with a shrug. He smirked wryly, as Heero glared at him.  
  
Duo grinned, "now there's a sight I wouldn't mind seeing..."  
  
"I'd rather not see that onna at all..." Wufei grumbled.  
  
"Hey, think about it, Wu-chan... the little princess, with saddlebags under her eyes... if you never had to see her again, isn't that how you'd want to remember her by..?" Duo asked, with a grin.  
  
"No..."  
  
"Wufei has my support on that one..." Heero said, shortly.  
  
"You guys are missing the entire point..." Quatre said, impatiently.  
  
"Okay, what was the point?" Trowa asked.  
  
"My point is, Relena's not gonna show up, tonight... she doesn't even know where we are now..."  
  
"What would you all say if I left her a note, with our new address and phone number..?" Duo said, smiling meekly.  
  
Heero, Trowa and Wufei's eyes widened. "DUO..!!!"  
  
Quatre shook his head, violently, "please be joking, Duo..!"  
  
Duo rolled his eyes, "yes, I'm joking..."  
  
"How does Relena keep finding us anyways...?" Heero wondered, aloud.  
  
"Who knows..?" Duo said, with a shrug.  
  
"Personally, if I ever found the baka who keeps relaying Heero, and our, whereabouts, I would strangle him, slice him in half, then quarters, then eighths, you all get the gist... then I'd feed him to the sharks..." Wufei said, darkly.  
  
"Ugh, thanks for the lovely image, Wu-chan..."  
  
"You're very welcome, Maxwell..." the Chinese pilot replied, with a small smirk.  
  
***  
  
"What kind of proposition is that..? Hilde asked, impatiently.  
  
"A very good one... Admit it, Hilde, you wanted Duo to yourself ever since you met him, correct?" Relena said, with a knowing smile.  
  
Hilde pursed her lips. Sure, she liked Duo. She liked him a lot, actually. But did she really want to go through with this whole plan?  
  
"Well?"  
  
Hilde scowled, "first of all, I don't like barging into other people's houses, and forcing them to accept me as a guest... and secondly, I don't appear to be getting anything out of this whole thing..."  
  
"Aren't you paying attention? You'll be getting exactly what you want..." Relena said, with a wave of her hand. "You'll be getting Duo..."  
  
Hilde tapped her chin. Okay, as long as no harm was being severely done. Then maybe it wouldn't be too bad.  
  
***  
  
Duo sighed, as he glanced at the clock again, 3 am. He looked around the living room; Quatre was already sleeping peacefully on the loveseat. Trowa was slowly nodding off as he leaned against the wall. Wufei, even though he sat cross-legged on the floor, unmoving, he was wide-awake and alert.  
  
"Must be his meditating..." Duo mused, then he glanced at Heero. The Japanese pilot was relaxing in an easy chair, playing with his gun. Well, not playing, per se. But being the Perfect Soldier, you would consider it playing.  
  
Heero would twirl the gun on his trigger finger, catch it then aim it at a random target, then twirl it again. He would occasionally stop his playing, to check his bullets, and then he'd play with the safety catch, turning it on, then off again. It was a pattern.  
  
Twirl. Catch. Aim. Twirl. Check. On. Off. Twirl. Catch... an endless cycle.  
  
And Duo found it fascinating to watch.  
  
In the middle of On and Off, Heero glanced at him, them smiled, faintly. "Yes?"  
  
"Heh, nothin..." Duo said, shortly, then went back to looking around the room. With a small chuckle, Heero went back to his game.  
  
Wufei opened one eye, "maybe Winner's right..." he said, slowly.  
  
Heero and Duo glanced at the Chinese pilot, "huh?"  
  
"Maybe the onna isn't arriving tonight..."  
  
THUD!  
  
Heero and Duo jumped up, aiming their guns to where Trowa was once standing a few seconds ago. Wufei was on his feet, in his fighting stance again.  
  
Then Trowa popped back up from behind the chair, smiling sheepishly.  
  
"What happened?!" Heero demanded.  
  
"I fell," Trowa said, slowly, unsure if he should've told them.  
  
He shouldn't have.  
  
They were all silent for a second, then Duo burst out laughing. He could just picture it!  
  
Trowa finally falling asleep, then slowly, but surely he'd begin to slide to the side. Resulting in a pleasant fall to wake him back up. Even better, his arms were folded while he was leaning! The image sent Duo into a fit of hysterics.  
  
Duo's laughter caused the blonde boy to open one eye, tiredly. "All of you... just go to sleep..." Quatre murmured, "she's not coming..." then he rolled over, and went back to sleep.  
  
"Not tired, anymore... guys, wanna tell ghost stories..?" Duo said, with an enthusiastic grin.  
  
Wufei rolled his eyes, "pssh..!" he started to scoff. Then it died in his throat as Heero glared at him, warningly.  
  
The Chinese pilot fidgeted. Heero was less homocidal, but he was still very protective of the braided boy.  
  
"I don't know any ghost stories..?" Wufei offered, with an innocent smile.  
  
Duo shrugged, "s' okay... neither do I... oh yeah..! But I did hear this one story..."  
  
Trowa yawned again, then he laid down on the plush carpet and curled up. In a few seconds he was sleeping.  
  
"Alright, this isn't exactly a ghost story..." Duo paused for dramatic effect. It wasn't very effective, considering who his audience was. He sighed; he had to have the stoic pilots' attention. Then he shrugged, beggars couldn't be choosers.  
  
"It's about Rice Krispies..."[1] he told them.  
  
Wufei raised an eyebrow, perplexed. Even Heero had to give his object of affection a slightly odd look.  
  
Duo grinned, then went on.  
  
"Did you know that Rice Krispies are actually dehydrated aliens that whisper evil commands to you when you give them milk..?" the American paused then shrugged, "okay, so I have never heard them, before... but that's the thing..."[2]  
  
Heero smiled in amusement, while Wufei watched Duo, with a raised eyebrow. Then he shook his head and stood up.  
  
"I think I will go to sleep..." he said, shortly, then he started to head upstairs.  
  
"Hey, I'm not done, Wu-chan..!" Duo called after him. Wufei sighed, and leaned on the banister to hear Duo out.  
  
"As I was saying, their leaders had refined and classy names... Like Lilly, Mina, Mumsy, Petunia, Audrey, Nigel, Archibald, and such and such...."  
  
Wufei shook his head, and glanced back at Duo, "Mumsy?" he asked, dryly.  
  
Duo nodded, trying to look serious, "odd as it sounds, they had many followers, because they saw their names as classy and refined, which was exactly what they were aiming for..."  
  
Wufei bit back his laughter, "good night Maxwell, Yuy..." then he headed upstairs.  
  
"Hey, I still wasn't done... man, no respect for suspense and thrillers these days..." Duo said, with a shake of his head.  
  
Heero smiled, "go to sleep, Duo..." he ordered. With a sigh of surrender, Duo lied down on the sofa. Heero sat on the floor, resting his head against the sofa. Within moments, they got to sleep.  
  
***  
  
Trowa frowned slightly. When did his bed get so hard? Groggily, he opened his eyes, and sat up. Oh yeah, they fell asleep in the living room. He looked around. Duo was there, Heero and Quatre, too.  
  
Hm, Wufei was smart enough to head to his room. The silent pilot got to his feet, and started for the kitchen, then he stopped. He could've sworn he saw something pink pull up in the driveway  
  
"Don't look..." he commanded himself. "If you don't look, it's not real..."  
  
But, that was like telling someone not to look down. Trowa whirled around, and looked out the enormous picture window. Seeing a pink limo.  
  
Trowa knew this was very out of character for him. But he felt like doing it.  
  
He screamed.  
  
Heero jumped up, looking around wildly, Duo rolled off the sofa and started crawling around on the floor, in search of a firearm of any kind. Quatre yawned, and rubbed his eyes as he slowly sat up.  
  
"What is it, Trowa...?"  
  
Wufei came charging down the stairs, this time with two katana blades at the ready.  
  
Trowa pointed out the window.  
  
The other four pilots had no idea how to react. Then they decided Trowa's way was best.  
  
They all screamed.  
  
***  
  
Hilde raised an eyebrow. She never heard boys' screaming before. Shrugging, she stepped up to the door and rang the doorbell.  
  
"AUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!" five male voices screamed again.  
  
Then she heard the sounds of running, crashing, thumping. And a few curses. Most in Japanese and Chinese, even a few in Arabian. The rest was in English.  
  
Before Hilde decided to ring the doorbell again, the door swung open. Then Hilde was greeted with two 9mm's, 2 katanas, and even one Uzi. And they were all aimed and held at her head.  
  
Hilde merely stared in shock. Then Duo grinned.  
  
"Hey, Hilde..! What're you doing here?" he said, with a wide, friendly smile.  
  
"Hi Duo... do you greet all of your guests like that?" Hilde asked, perplexed. Duo shrugged and lowered his gun, Wufei put down the katana, and Trowa put down his weapon as well. Heero frowned, not showing any signs of lowering his gun.  
  
"Hey, Hee-chan, take it easy... it's just Hilde...." Duo said, cheerfully.  
  
No response.  
  
Hilde couldn't help but fidget. She just arrived and she already feared for her life.  
  
"How can Relena see this as Heero showing her his feelings..?" Hilde wondered. Duo laughed, and rested his hand on Heero's arm, "alright, we get it... you're a tough soldier, no need to scare our old friends, right?"  
  
Heero glanced at Duo. Hilde's jaw nearly hit the ground, seeing Heero give Duo the smallest yet cutest smile.  
  
Heero lowered the gun, and walked back inside. Wufei and Trowa shrugged and followed. Hilde was lead inside by Duo. She raised an eyebrow once they reached the living room. A platinum-haired teenager peeked out from behind the couch, holding a wooden spoon in a threatening manner.  
  
"Relax, Cat... it's just Hilde..." Duo said, assuringly.  
  
Quatre straightened up, and smiled sheepishly, "sorry..."  
  
Hilde smiled. Duo turned to her, "so Hilde, what brings you here?"  
  
Hilde fidgeted, "ummm... Duo, I know this may seem rude, but I was wondering if it was possible for me to... uhhhh, stay here..?"  
  
Duo blinked.  
  
"For a little while..! A week, tops...!" she added hastily. Duo scratched the back of his head, uncertainly.  
  
"I honestly... would let you, Hilde... but, uhhh... see, there's this small thing with Heero..." Duo started to explain.  
  
***  
  
"Why is she here?" Heero asked, his eyes narrowing as he stared hard at Hilde. Trowa and Wufei shrugged.  
  
"Try not to threaten her, Heero... we just finished with our therapist..." Trowa said, dully.  
  
Heero ignored him, his trigger finger beginning to twitch unhealthily again.  
  
"Yuy, knock it off... Duo likes you, no one else..." Wufei snapped.  
  
Heero glared at Wufei in the corner of his eye, "what did you call him?"  
  
"Uhhh... Maxwell..?"  
  
"Mm-mm..." Trowa said, with a smirk, "you called him Duo..."  
  
"Shut. Up. Barton!" Wufei hissed.  
  
Heero sighed, "never mind... Hilde is my main objective now..." he narrowed his Prussian blue eyes. "Omae o korosu..."  
  
Wufei and Trowa glanced at each other. "Uh-oh..."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
[1] Not mine, I think it's Kellogg's O.o yeah, that's it, I think...  
  
[2] ARIGATOU, LILLY!!! heh, she offered me the Rice Krispies story, thanks again, Lil' ^_^ you're the best..!  
  
Damn this one was so boring! Way to make my reappearance! *shrugs* So sleepy v.v ZzzzzzzZzzzzzZzzzzzzz...  
  
Oh yeah, PS, just so people know. I'm not really back fully, per se. I did this on my friend's computer. mine's still on the fritz. but if I can do this every so often, I should be able to update the others. I'm working on them. Just can't get them up that fast. 


	3. The Plan

ALRIGHT, I FINALLY MADE IT!!! oh yeah... er-hem...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or the characters... curses, huh?  
  
Warnings: I wish I knew... no serious language, I think... shounen-ai, which is guys liking guys, no like, no read... and definite OOCness, because it's me *shrugs* gomen... okey-dokey? okey-dokey ^_^  
  
Pairings? well, it's definitely 1+2/2+1... officially some 3+2(he has his reasons), maybe some added 5+2(he also has his reasons)... oh yeah H+2, too... okey dokey...  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hilde hummed to herself, as she strolled around the mansion. It was a very beautiful home. Considering there were nothing but teenage guys living there. There was a housekeeper, but no butler(something about Duo being lazy enough, already?).  
  
She plucked up a magazine, and sat down in an easy chair, then started to read.  
  
***  
  
Heero narrowed his eyes, as he crept up to Hilde with great stealth. Within a few seconds, he was directly behind her. He smirked devillishly and raised the vase over his head, ready to bring it down on Hilde's head.  
  
"HEERO!" Quatre cried.  
  
Hilde whirled around, just as Heero lowered the vase and hid it behind his back. He turned around to see the Arabian standing in the livingroom's entrance, tapping his foot.  
  
"What's going on?" Hilde asked, nervously.  
  
Heero pursed his lips, giving the younger a boy an innocent look, "what?" he asked, with a tone that rivalled Quatre's kind nature.  
  
"Step away..." Quatre ordered.  
  
"But, I..."  
  
"Heero..."  
  
"No, Quatre... I..."  
  
"Heero..."  
  
"I was just..."  
  
"Heero..!"  
  
With a sigh of defeat, Heero walked up to Quatre and the livingroom's entrance.  
  
"... Hand it over..." Quatre said, calmly.  
  
"Hand over what..?"  
  
"Heero."  
  
Grimacing, the Japanese pilot handed the younger boy the vase.  
  
"And the paperweight..."  
  
Heero sighed again, as he pulled out the heavy piece of glass from his jacket pocket and handed it over, as well. Quatre nodded, permitting Heero leave, who did, looking rather glum. Hilde just stared, not really understanding what just happened.  
  
***  
  
"Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold, cold..!" Duo was chanting, as he shivered in the corner of the sofa. "Is this damn office always cold!?"  
  
"It's called a den, Maxwell... and if you're cold, perhaps you should go somewhere else..." Wufei said, as he flipped through his novel.  
  
"Can't move... too cold..." Duo informed him, his teeth chattering.  
  
"Then get a blanket, at least."  
  
"Perhaps you never heard me the first time..." Duo said, dryly. "Can't move... too cold... ringing any bells?"  
  
Wufei rolled his eyes. "And what, praytell, would you like me to do about it..?" he asked, calmly.  
  
"I dunno... turn up the heat?"  
  
"The temperature's fine, Maxwell..."  
  
"Spoken like a true He-Man[1]..!" Duo spat, sarcastically, still shivering.  
  
"Damnit..." Wufei grumbled, "Yuy's gonna kill me..." Sighing, the Chinese pilot got up, and sat next to Duo. Then wordlessly went back to reading. Duo grinned, and in a surprisingly subtle manner, he snuggled closer to Wufei.  
  
"Thanks, Wu-chan..!"  
  
"Hn... if you hear Yuy coming, I'm moving..."  
  
Duo nodded, "gotcha..."  
  
"Wow, the scandel..." Trowa commented, as he leaned against the doorframe of the den. A small smirk on his face, seeing Wufei willingly sit so close to Duo.  
  
"Not a word, Barton..." Wufei said, calmly. Trowa shrugged, then glanced at Duo.  
  
"Hilde's looking for you..."  
  
Duo blinked, "why?"  
  
"Isn't it obvious..? 'Ooh, Duo... I love your big, pretty eyes... your laugh, your braid... I wanna be near you always..!" Trowa said, in a painfully familiar kind of tone.  
  
"Whoa, flashback! Stop talkin, Tro-kun!" Duo yelped, covering his ears.  
  
Wufei grinned, "Trowa le Peau[2]..." That sent Wufei over. He started laughing hysterically at the memory. Trowa blushed, faintly.  
  
"Shut up, Wufei..."  
  
"There a reason you just finished saying all of that to Duo, Trowa...?" a cold voice asked. Trowa gulped and turned around, "heh... hi Heero," he said, nervously.  
  
"Don't start, Yuy..." Wufei said, grimacing. Heero shifted his cold gaze towards Wufei, who was sitting a little too close to Duo. Wufei blinked, then started to fidget under the intense glare.  
  
Duo looked confused, "what's goin on?" he asked.  
  
Heero smiled faintly at Duo, "Duo, may I speak to these two, alone..?"  
  
Duo raised an eyebrow, "you wanna hit on them?"  
  
All three of the pilots' eyebrows shot up, "WHAAT!?"  
  
"Kidding!" Duo said, he got up and started to laugh. "... Shoulda seen your faces..." he managed to choke out as he strolled out, still shivering a bit.  
  
"That boy has issues..." Trowa commented. Then he remembered Heero was right there. "Uhhhhh, in a good way..!" he added, hastily.  
  
"Hn..."  
  
"What do you want, Yuy..?"  
  
"I need you both to do me a favor..."  
  
Trowa and Wufei glanced at each other. Then turned back to Heero, "what kinda favor?" they asked in unison.  
  
"I'm going to go find Relena..."  
  
"There a reason why?" Trowa asked.  
  
"Yes..."  
  
"Which would be..?" Wufei pressed.  
  
"I'm going to kill her..."  
  
"CAN I GO!?" both of the other pilots asked, eagerly.  
  
Heero smirked, wryly, "no..."  
  
"Damn..." they both muttered.  
  
"This is where your favor comes in... I really don't trust Hilde... I trust Duo, but Hilde's a completely different story... so, if you don't mind..?"  
  
"You want us to spy on 'your' Duo..." Wufei asked, with a raised eyebrow, then he scowled. "I'm not doing such a thing!"  
  
Trowa frowned, slightly, "if you trust Duo, there's nothing to worry about..." he pointed out.  
  
"True... but Hilde doesn't strike me as the trust-worthy type... anyways, I want you to keep an eye on Hilde, that's all..." Heero explained.  
  
"And if she's doing anything..?" Trowa asked.  
  
"Anything..?" Wufei echoed, confused.  
  
"Funny business..." Trowa explained.  
  
"Oh..."  
  
"Kill her..." Heero said, simply.  
  
"WHAAT!?" both of the other pilots yelped.  
  
Heero smirked, "gotcha..." then he turned and walked out of the den. Trowa and Wufei glanced at each other, uncertainly. It was kind of hard to tell if he really was joking or not. Then Wufei suddenly had a thought, so he raced to the door.  
  
"Wait! How long you gonna be!?" he hollered after him.  
  
"Long enough..." Heero called back, then he went to his room. His bedroom door closed with a click, which seemed to be sealing Trowa and Wufei's fate.  
  
"I don't believe it..." Wufei said, with a shake of his head.  
  
"Me either..." Trowa said, slowly. "Who knew Heero had a sense of humor..?"  
  
Wufei rolled his eyes. Trowa smirked, then sighed.  
  
"Guess we better get started..."  
  
"We aren't baby-sitters, Barton..."  
  
"True... we're spies..." Trowa said, with a light grin. Then he grabbed Wufei's shirt and dragged him along.  
  
"KISAMA! I'M NOT DOING THIS!" Wufei snapped.  
  
"It's your chance to watch 'Maxwell', Wufei... why complain?" Trowa asked, his grin slowly becoming a taunting smirk.  
  
"Don't start..." Wufei spat. Then his face fell, suddenly getting another thought. "What about Winner?"  
  
Trowa blinked, "what about him?"  
  
Wufei frowned, "I don't think he'll really approve of us spying on Duo for Yuy's sake..."  
  
The green-eyed pilot looked mildly amused.  
  
"What?" Wufei asked, suspiciously.  
  
"You're starting to call him 'Duo' more than 'Maxwell'," Trowa pointed out.  
  
"What part of 'don't start', don't you understand?" Wufei growled. Trowa snickered, and ran down the hall, Wufei on his heels.  
  
"Just out of curiousity..." Trowa called, as he ran.  
  
"What?" Wufei snapped, as he grabbed an apple from the fruitbowl as they ran through the kitchen. Then he hurled it at Trowa. The acrobat easily veered left, dodging the apple, and darted back down the hall.  
  
"How will we go about all this?" he asked.  
  
"Go about what?" Wufei asked, looking for something else to throw.  
  
"How will we go about keeping Hilde from Duo?" Trowa asked, then dodged the Nerf ball[2] Wufei suddenly scooped up from the floor(and threw). Again, Trowa dodged, by turning and running into the livingroom.  
  
Wufei smirked, "you can be seductive, again."  
  
Trowa glanced back at him, gaping in shock "WHAAT?!" Then he ran into the sofa, thus flipping over it. "WHOA!" and landed with a pleasant THUMP on the other side. Wufei strolled over, looking over at him, still smirking.  
  
"Well?"  
  
"You have any idea how many more appointments with the therapist I'll need, if I go and try to seduce Duo, again?" Trowa asked, looking up at him, completely deadpan. Then he narrowed his eyes at the younger pilot, "unless you want me to get killed..."  
  
"No, of course not... you are a comrade..." Wufei said with a shrug, then his smirk returned. "It'll make things easier on us, if Hilde thinks you're after Duo..."  
  
"We..!"  
  
Wufei raised an eyebrow, "we?"  
  
"Yes, 'we'! I'm not gonna face Heero alone, when he gets back..."  
  
"So... you agree..?"  
  
"Only if you're involved, too..." Trowa replied. Then he stood up. Both pilots tried to stare each other down. Into submission.  
  
Finally, Wufei sighed, and held out his hand, "very well..." he agreed. Trowa smirked, and shook his hand.  
  
"We'll both do our best in keeping Hilde away from Duo..." he said, wryly.  
  
"... By continually interrupting them, and putting the moves on Duo..." Wufei added, with a solemn nod. But he was smirking, ruefully.  
  
Trowa grinned, slightly, "you're still callin him 'Duo'... more than 'Maxwell'..." then he turned and ran. "Wait till Heero hears!"  
  
"KISAMA! BARTON!" Wufei instantly took chase, again.  
  
***  
  
Hilde sighed. Who knew good-byes took so long? She glanced at them again, not really believing that it was Heero standing shyly in front of Duo, trying to say good-bye.  
  
"Yeah... no problem, Hee-chan..." Duo was saying, cheerfully, "just try not to forget me, huh?"  
  
"I would never..." Heero said, softly. Then in a rather timid manner, he gently kissed Duo on the lips. Duo blinked, then smiled. Heero smiled, glad for the approval. Then he took up his backpack, and walked out the front door.  
  
Hilde pursed her lips, then bounded up to Duo, who was waving good- bye, "see you later, Hee-chan..."  
  
"So... where's he off to?" she asked, curiously.  
  
"To find Relena..." Duo answered, with a shrug.  
  
"Ummm, why?"  
  
Duo smirked, in a devillish manner, "to kill her..."  
  
Hilde grimaced inwardly. Well, that couldn't be good. She would have to warn Relena later. "Umm, Duo... you think you could give me a tour of the place?" she asked, shyly. Duo blinked again, looking adorably confused.  
  
"But you already know the layout, the way you keep walking from place to place..."  
  
"I mean outside..." without waiting for his reply, Hilde grabbed Duo's arm and dragged him outside.  
  
"But, I..." Duo started to protest. Too late. Then he remembered Hilde was never one to take "no" for an answer.  
  
***  
  
"Will you stop that!?" Wufei hissed. Trowa smirked, slightly.  
  
"Flat tire..." he said, simply. He kept accidentally stepping on the back of Wufei's shoe. Unfortunately Wufei thought he was doing it on purpose. So, Trowa started pretending he was.  
  
Wufei narrowed his onyx black eyes at the taller pilot, "you think you're funny, don't you?" he asked, sarcastically.  
  
"Why yes, I do..." Trowa said, shortly. Then he turned back to the scene.  
  
"I feel like an idiot..." Wufei grumbled, as he stooped over, watching Hilde carefully.  
  
"Oh Duo! It's so beautiful!" she gushed, as she gazed up at the cherry blossoms.  
  
"Yeah... count on Cat to have cherry trees around here... it gets even better later in the season..." Duo told her.  
  
"I'll take your word for it..." Hilde said, smiling brightly at the braided boy. Then she stepped up to him, gazing up at him, shyly. "Umm, Duo... there's something I've been meaning to tell you..."  
  
Trowa glanced at his companion, "now?"  
  
Wufei frowned, and shook his head.  
  
"But... like you always taught me... actions speak louder than words..." Hilde went on. Duo tilted his head.  
  
"What's up, Hilde?"  
  
"Duo..." she whispered, and her lips were now less than two inches away from his mouth.  
  
"Now..?" Trowa asked.  
  
Wufei shook his head, again.  
  
Duo frowned slightly, okay this was weird. Hilde was hitting on him? Or what? Hilde grabbed Duo's shoulders, and pulled herself up on her toes... so close...  
  
"Now?" Trowa asked, nervous about Heero's reaction if he ever found out about this.  
  
"Now..." Wufei confirmed. "Go in..."  
  
Trowa sighed. Why did he always have to be the guy to...? Never mind that... he had a job to do. With a defeated slump in his shoulders, Trowa straightened up, and walked over. Then he sped up to a jog, then a run. Then finally it became a full-on sprint. And since Trowa's legs were long, he was unrealistically fast while running.  
  
"DUO!" he yelled.  
  
"Huh?" Duo blinked in surprise. Then he was tackled to the ground. "ACK!" Groggily, he opened his eyes, staring into dark green eyes. "Tro-kun..?" he mumbled, his head aching slightly from hitting the ground.  
  
Trowa rested his nose on Duo's gently, "I've been looking for you..." he murmured, in a dangerously familiar kind of tone.  
  
"Trowa..?" Duo said, slowly, cautiously.  
  
All Hilde could do was stare at the scene. Trowa straddling Duo, looking about ready to kiss him! "WHAT'RE YOU DOING!?" Hilde shouted. Trowa sat up, giving Hilde a slightly annoyed, if not confused, look.  
  
"What?" he asked, dryly.  
  
Duo propped himself up on his elbows, and watched Trowa for a moment, "what can I do for you, Trowa?"  
  
Trowa smirked at him, "wouldn't you like to know..? But I can't tell you in front of a lady..."  
  
Duo suddenly blushed at the seductive tone Trowa's voice took on. "You better not start all that again!"  
  
"Start all what again, Duo?"  
  
"Exactly what I was wondering..!" Hilde spat. Duo was two-timing Heero! With Trowa!? Wait. Wasn't she supposed to be getting Duo away from Heero? But... if Duo had a secret relationship with Trowa, then Heero was a victim..? Hilde bit her lip, feeling a small twinge of sympathy towards Wing's pilot. But she quickly pushed it down. No, she had a job to do!  
  
"I think I'll leave you two alone.. since that's what you're so eager for..!" Hilde snapped. She whirled around on her heel, and stormed away.  
  
"Hilde! Wait!" she heard Duo yell. "Oh great! You got her mad at me!"  
  
Hilde smiled in satisfaction.  
  
"Why do you care?" Trowa asked, sounding confused.  
  
"I don't like having people mad at me, you know that..!" Duo retorted. Hilde's face fell, then she released a low growl, and stormed on. The nerve!  
  
Then Wufei appeared, "where's Trowa?" he asked, not bothering to say her name. But at least he didn't refer to her as 'woman' or 'onna'.  
  
"Back there, with Duo..." she snapped.  
  
"Someone's moody..." Wufei muttered, then he smirked, "PMS?" Hilde glared at him. But Wufei grew a slight immunity to glares, since they all paled in comparison to a certain pilot's 'DeathGlare'.  
  
"Where are they?" he asked, shortly.  
  
"By the cherry tree..." she grumbled. Wufei raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Oh... they're starting without me..?" with that, Wufei turned, and walked more briskly towards the direction Hilde came from. Hilde gaped after him. A threesome!? A THREESOME!? Between Duo, Trowa and Wufei!? Who knew Trowa and Wufei were like that! Poor Heero!  
  
"No! No poor Heero!" Hilde told herself, sternly. "He's keeping you away from Duo!" she paused, quirking an eyebrow, "and so are Trowa and Wufei now, apparently..." she bit her lip. Things were getting complicated. And Relena said all she had to concern herself with, was Heero Yuy?  
  
"I can do this..! I can still do this!" she said, with a firm nod. At least, she hoped she could.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
[1] *blinks* I don't think I mean 'He-Man' like the cartoon toy... but all in all, not mine ^^()  
  
[2] who was it that said this, again? Kaori! erm, I kinda took your name for Trowa on ch. 8 of DD, okay? thank you and sorry v_v  
  
[3] Nerf, not mine! who's Nerf ball..? let's say... Duo's? ^_^ yeah, Duo's  
  
*******  
  
Oh yeah, okay... I figured out how to go about all this... I think O.o;;; I'm crossing my fingers ^_^() 


	4. The Better Plan

Disclaimer: THEY'RE MINE! ALL MINE! I STOLE THEM FAIR AND SQUARE! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT!?!? HUH?! HUH!?  
  
Lawyer: Ms. Nanashi, the court date will be...  
  
Nanashi: ack! I WAS KIDDING! THEY'RE NOT MINE! HONEST!  
  
Lawyer: *frowns, not believing her*  
  
Nanashi: I swear! Gundam Wing and its characters belong to Bandai or something, not me! [*thinks*: I think it was Bandai...]  
  
Lawyer: alright then... *walks away*  
  
Nanashi: phew v.v  
  
Warnings: ummmmmm... *thinks* .O well, let's see.. shounen-ai, that's guys liking guys... of course you probably got that from the first few chapters, right? well, yeah... I think so ^_^ language? heavens, no! well, I don't think so anyways... *blinks*  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Duo blinked a few times, okay this was weird.  
  
"What's wrong with you guys!?" he demanded, as he was being dragged towards the mansion. Trowa holding one of his arms, Wufei holding the other.  
  
"Nothing..." they both said, shortly.  
  
"You guys never talked in unison before..." Duo pointed out, watching them, suspiciously.  
  
Wufei gave Trowa a look. With a grimace, Trowa pushed Wufei back, spun around and gathered Duo in his arms.  
  
"We want to be alone with you... is that a crime...?" he whispered, huskily. Duo's eyes widened.  
  
"Whaat!?" he squawked. He struggled, "lemme go! LEMME GO! HALP! TROWA LE PEAU'S BACK!!!" Duo shouted.  
  
Wufei bit his lip, trying not to laugh at the new 'alias' of Trowa's. Trowa shot the Chinese boy a look, daring him to push his luck. With a simple shrug, Wufei looked off in the other direction.  
  
***  
  
"Wait, wait, wait... Lemme get this straight..." Quatre said, slowly. "Trowa... and Wufei... are at the cherry tree, in a..." he paused, his face reddening.  
  
Hilde nodded, "...in a kinky threesome!" she spat. "WITH DUO!" she got to her feet, glaring out the sliding glass door.  
  
Quatre gently sat Hilde back down, then he sighed and shook his head. "But... that can't be possible, Hilde..." he argued.  
  
"Why's that?" Hilde demanded.  
  
"Well... for one thing, those two went through a lot with Heero... so, they wouldn't try and push their luck now, just because Heero's gone..." the blonde explained.  
  
"What!?" Hilde gasped, "those two! With Heero!?"  
  
Quatre blinked, then nodded, "well yes... Heero was a bit violent, and tended to over-react a bit, hence the reason Trowa and Wufei are so cautious now..."  
  
"CAUTIOUS?! YOU CALL THAT CAUTIOUS!?" Hilde jabbed her finger towards the sliding glass door, pointing outside. Quatre raised an eyebrow, then glanced over his shoulder, seeing his fellow pilots.  
  
"What..? What's the big deal?"  
  
"Wh-what's the big deal!?" Hilde sputtered. "Don't you see that?!"  
  
"Yeah... they're fighting... they always do that..." Quatre said, with a shrug.  
  
"Then, I'll have to put a stop to it!" the former pilot declared. She got to her feet and stormed towards the door. Quatre sighed.  
  
***  
  
"GET OFF!"  
  
"DUO! CALM DOWN! I'M KIDDING!" Trowa hollered.  
  
"Oh... is that why you're SITTING ON ME?!" Duo yelled. Trowa sighed, and sat up, giving Wufei a look, who shrugged.  
  
"Maybe it's best he think we're serious... that way he won't explain anything to the onna..." Wufei suggested. Trowa raised an eyebrow.  
  
"You think so..?"  
  
Wufei nodded. Thankfully, Duo was yelling too loud to hear them.  
  
Wufei then raised an eyebrow, "I think you can get off of him..." he said, slowly.  
  
"Huh?" Trowa asked, confused, then he looked down at Duo. "Oh... oops..." he got up and dusted off his pants. Duo lied there on the grass, panting.  
  
"I'VE BEEN VIOLATED!"  
  
"POOR BABY!" Hilde cried, and ran over, to him, and held Duo's head in her lap. She began making sweet, comforting cooes, as she smoothed Duo's bangs back. Duo blinked in confusion.  
  
Why was everyone treating him like this, today!?  
  
Wufei and Trowa glanced at each other. "Your turn..." Trowa mouthed. With a sigh, Wufei stepped up, and pulled Duo out of Hilde's lap and to his feet.  
  
"Hey!" Hilde protested.  
  
"What th..!?" Duo yelped. Then he blinked, staring into a pair of onyx black eyes, that were shining, with something... admiration? Not exactly. Affection...? Pretty close. Love? maybe..? Duo's eyes widened.  
  
"Wu-chan...?" Duo said, slowly, cautiously.  
  
"Hn?" Wufei asked, simply holding Duo close. Duo gulped. Okay, not good. This was really not good.  
  
"Oh man..." Duo thought, nervously. "You can let me go now..!" he squeaked.  
  
"And... if I don't..?" Wufei murmured. Duo swallowed. Who knew Wu-chan could take on a seductive kind of tone, like Trowa?  
  
"THAT'S IT!" Hilde shouted, she grabbed Duo's braid, and yanked him out of Wufei's grasp.  
  
"ACK!" Duo whirled around, "NO ONE TOUCHES THE BRAID!" he shouted. Everyone froze, shocked that Duo had an outburst.  
  
"... Well, except for Hee-chan, Wu-chan, Tro-kun and Cat..." Duo ammended, "but besides that, no one else is allowed!"  
  
"Why them?" Hilde asked, confused.  
  
"Simply put, Wu-chan and Tro-kun wouldn't touch my hair, unless they had a good reason, so no worries there... Cat only touches my braid, so he can help me with my hair... and Hee-chan..." Duo explained.  
  
"... Has a hair fetish..." Trowa and Wufei interrupted, in unison. Duo turned red, while Hilde gaped at them in shock.  
  
***  
  
Heero frowned, as he stared up at the Peacecraft palace. His eyes narrowed, as he loaded a clip into his 9mm. It was time. Relena would never interfere with him and Duo, ever again.  
  
***  
  
Wufei and Trowa both paced in the den, passing each other, over and over. Trowa's arms were folded, his head lowered as he walked back and forth. A classic look of a person thinking. Wufei's hands were latched behind his back, a pen in his mouth, which he unconsciously chewed on as he thought, as he walked back and forth.  
  
"I've got it!" Trowa declared.  
  
Wufei pulled the pen out of his mouth, giving Trowa a look. "You already had that idea..." he said, dryly.  
  
Trowa frowned, thoughtfully, then he glared at Wufei, "how do you know?"  
  
"You've been coming up with the same idea, every time you say, 'I've got it!'" the Chinese pilot said, with a roll of his eyes.  
  
Trowa blinked, then sighed, "would my plan involve...?" he started to ask.  
  
"... Throwing Hilde out the window, while she sleeps..? Yes, that's the same plan..." Wufei said, sourly. "You're almost as bad as Yuy, when he's jealous, Barton..."  
  
Trowa grimaced, "okay, so I'm lacking in creativity..." he muttered. "Don't see you coming up with any ideas..."  
  
Wufei leaned against the oak desk, his brow furrowed, thoughtfully. "I think we're going about this, all wrong..." he murmured, as he stared at the floor.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"We put the moves on Duo, he runs... so, maybe..." he paused, chewing on a pen, still trying to put more thought into his idea. Then a devillish glint appeared in his onyx black eyes.  
  
"What?" Trowa asked, curiously.  
  
A sly smirk appeared on Wufei's face. "I have an idea..." he murmured.  
  
***  
  
Quatre sighed, seeing Hilde latching onto Duo's arms, trying to flirt with him. Duo was forcing a polite smile, and constantly changing the subject.  
  
"Duo... you know your eyes are..."  
  
"Speaking of eyes... I think I better go check on the pins..." Duo said, with a quick grin. He yanked his arm free, and ran to the livingroom.  
  
Hilde blinked, then sighed, her shoulders slumping, "maybe I'm trying too hard..."  
  
Quatre pursed his lips, not liking the sight of an enthusiastic person like Hilde being so glum. But, she was trying to interfere with Heero and Duo, by the looks of it. But, still...  
  
"Heero... he thought he was trying too hard, too..." Quatre said, quietly. Hilde jerked her head up, staring at Quatre in surprise.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Heero... about a month ago, back at our old mansion... Heero had a huge thing for Duo, but Duo was oblivious to it... one of Duo's weird antics to get on Relena's nerves kind of pushed Heero's feelings over the edge."  
  
Hilde blinked. Antics? Oh, must be talking about that kiss that Relena witnessed between Heero and Duo.  
  
"Heero was then positive he loved Duo... the guy would always come to me, pouring his heart out... asking me for advice..." Quatre paused, and smiled, "when he wouldn't be threatening anyone, of course..." he added.  
  
"So... Heero, and Trowa... and Wufei..? Are they..?" Hilde paused, unsure how to finish. Quatre raised an eyebrow, then shrugged.  
  
"I think they're getting along fine, now... I hope... I do still hear their discussions, but I pay them no mind, since they don't happen that often, anymore..." Quatre said, with a shrug, and went back to reading the newspaper.  
  
Hilde pursed her lips. Okay, what she gathered so far. Heero was a violent guy, he used to be in a relationship with Trowa, then Wufei... perhaps both at once. And now that they broke up, Trowa and Wufei want Duo. And whoever they want, Heero wants. But then... Duo seemed to genuinely like Heero. Okay, wait... this was getting confusing. Hilde furrowed her brow, her confusion growing. With a sigh of defeat, Hilde got up, and headed after Duo, ready to try again.  
  
***  
  
Duo yawned, as he stared at the TV, flipping mindlessly through the channels. Barely acknowledging Wufei's entrance. The Chinese boy strolled up, and plucked the remote control from Duo's hand.  
  
"HEY!" the American protested.  
  
Without a word, Wufei sat down, and flipped to the Documentary channel.  
  
"Change it!"  
  
Wufei glanced at him, smirked, then went back to watching TV.  
  
"Wu-chan... I'm warning you... change it back!"  
  
Wufei ignored him.  
  
"Give me the remote then, Wu-chan..."  
  
Still no reply.  
  
Duo sighed, then grimaced as he looked at the TV. A documentary on the scarecrow's orgin?![1]  
  
"Wu-chan! change it..!"  
  
"Make me..." Wufei answered, coolly.  
  
Duo stared in shock. "Is that a challenge, Wu-chan..?" he asked, incredulously. Wufei smirked.  
  
"It is!" Duo gasped, then he grinned, devillishly. "Alright then..! I win, we watch what I wanna watch..?"  
  
Wufei nodded. "Doubt you will, though..."  
  
"Heh..." Duo said, with a confident smirk. Then he lunged at Wufei.  
  
"WHOA!" Wufei exclaimed, as he was knocked over the arm of the sofa, to the floor.  
  
***  
  
Trowa smiled, as he watched the scene unfold, from upstairs. Wufei's plan was working well so far. Duo was very playful, and even moreso when he was encouraged. He grinned, as the remote flew from Wufei's hand. Neither pilots acknowledged it. Just continued their quiet, playful brawl.  
  
***  
  
Hilde gasped at the sight in front of her! Duo lying on top of Wufei, both were panting, and a bit flushed. Duo holding onto one of Wufei's wrists, Wufei holding onto one of his.[2] They both looked up at Hilde, surprise written all over their faces.  
  
"Uhhh, hey Hilde..." Duo said, slowly.  
  
"Wh-what's going on..?" Hilde asked, nearly hyperventilating.  
  
"N-Nothing..."  
  
"Doesn't look like nothing!" Hilde snapped.  
  
Duo blinked and looked down at Wufei, then back at Hilde, "what's it look like then?"  
  
Hilde's face flared, "exactly like it looks like!"  
  
Wufei cleared his throat, "I think I better leave, Maxwell..." he muttered. Duo looked confused, but then he nodded, and let Wufei up.  
  
Straightening his shirt, Wufei turned and walked out of the livingroom and up the stairs. Hilde stared after him, in shock. She just caught them in a passionate embrace!?  
  
***  
  
Wufei was trying very hard not to smile, as he walked upstairs. Then he grinned, as he walked up to Trowa, who stood in the hall, waiting patiently.  
  
"Understand, now?" Wufei asked.  
  
Trowa nodded, "I'm impressed..." he said, with a smirk.  
  
"Alright... that's all we have to do, now..."  
  
"Heero will not be pleased about all this..." Trowa commented.  
  
"Heero can't get angry, either..." Wufei pointed out.  
  
"Why's that?"  
  
"Duo's usually the one who starts it... we'll merely be the ones to provoke it..."  
  
Trowa smirked, "you're a devious one, Chang... I respect that."  
  
Wufei smirked, "you better..."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
[1] not sure if there is such a thing... er, not mine? *shrugs, confused*  
  
[2] Nanashi: a quick message from, Nanaki... go ahead...  
  
Nanaki: WAI!!! *squeals* hentai thoughts! ^_______^  
  
Nanashi: this has been a message from Nanaki... *shrugs* 


	5. Complications

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing, and its characters, aren't mine... *shrugs* I think the gist was caught in the earlier chapters, ne? eh, it's just fun repeating it ^_^  
  
Warnings: er... shounen-ai, but I think that gist was caught, too ^_^ language? nah... if there is, it shouldn't be too serious ^_^ H+2, assumed 4+2 and 3+2... slight 5+2... *shrugs* ^_^  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"I'm.... so hungry..!" Duo wailed, as he clutched at his stomach, staring up at the ceiling. Then a knock at the boy's door.  
  
"Who is it!? And unless you're bearing food, get lost!"  
  
"Uhhh, I have an apple..?" Quatre's voice said, slowly. Duo got to his feet and ran to the door, nearly tearing it off its hinges, as he opened it.  
  
"GIMME!" he ordered, his tongue hanging out, his hands outstretched. Quatre blinked, and held up his apple, already a few Quatre-sized bites taken out of it.  
  
"Just a guess here, Duo, but... are you hungry..?" the Arabian asked, slowly.  
  
Duo's stomach growled loudly, answering for him. Quatre smiled, as Duo blushed, slightly.  
  
"Just a bit..." he admitted. His stomach growled again, practically protesting the 'just a bit' statement.  
  
Quatre chuckled, "Trowa's making dinner..." he informed him. Duo blinked, then pretended to pout.  
  
"You're not cooking?"  
  
Quatre shook his head, "nope... I'm on hiatus for the time being... burned my hand too many times..."  
  
"Really?" Duo asked, his face lit with concern. He grabbed Quatre's hand, and started to examine it. "Wow... I had no idea your hands were so sensitive, Cat..."  
  
"Well, yeah... I mean it is oil we're dealing with, here..."  
  
"Hmmm, guess we shouldn't use it so often, huh?"  
  
Quatre laughed, "that might be for the best... might make things more interesting..." he agreed.  
  
Duo nodded, "oh yeah..."  
  
***  
  
Hilde gasped. Was she hearing things!? She was just walking upstairs, to go see Duo. And she was hearing a conversation between Duo and Quatre.  
  
"... I had no idea your hands were so sensitive, Cat..." Duo's voice.  
  
A very unusual conversation.  
  
"Well, yeah..." Quatre said, with a small sigh, "I mean, it is oil we're dealing with, here..."  
  
"Hmmm, guess we shouldn't use it so often, huh?"  
  
Quatre's light laugh. "That might be for the best..." a small pause. "Might make things more interesting..."  
  
"Oh yeah..." Duo's voice, and it sounded... sultry. Full of lust. Hilde quickly ran around the corner. She had to interrupt! Fast!  
  
WHAM!!!  
  
"ACK!"  
  
She sat up, finding herself in Quatre's lap, who was in Duo's lap. They both stared at Hilde, in confusion.  
  
"Hey, Hilde... what's up?" Duo asked, not feeling at all awkward at the slender, blonde form that sat in his arms, practically.  
  
"I... I just had to see... what you were doing, Duo," Hilde said, with a forced cheerful smile.  
  
"Oh... Cat was just showing me..." Duo started to say.  
  
"OH, I KNOW WHAT 'CAT' WAS TRYING TO SHOW YOU..!" Hilde shouted.  
  
Duo and Quatre glanced at each other, confused. Then looked back at Hilde.  
  
"I had no idea you were that kind of person, Duo!"  
  
"What kind of person?" both pilots asked, in unison.  
  
"AND BEHIND HEERO'S BACK, TOO! WITH QUATRE, EVEN! AND WUFEI! AND TROWA!"  
  
Quatre blinked, "what're you talking about, Hilde?"  
  
Hilde pointed at him, "YOU! YOU PROBABLY SEDUCED HIM INTO IT!"  
  
Quatre's face turned red, "excuse me..!?" he sputtered. Duo raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Seduced me into what?" he asked, looking very confused. Even More than usual. Hilde leaned in, her blue eyes piercing into Quatre's green-blue eyes.  
  
"I can play that game, too!"  
  
Quatre slouched back, pressed up against Duo, gulping. "What kind of game..?" he asked, nervously.  
  
Hilde narrowed her eyes, "NO ONE WILL STAND IN MY WAY!" she shouted, as she threw her head back, and started to laugh maniacally. Duo's eyes widened, getting hit with a sense of deja vu. As was Quatre. He jumped to his feet.  
  
"Hilde! You actually think that I... with Duo...? As in... me, and Duo... doing..." Quatre stammered, his face flaring.  
  
Hilde composed herself, instantaneously. Then she nodded, "uh-huh... and you're not denying it either, are you!?"  
  
Duo stood up, "whoa, whoa, whoa... what's to deny, Hilde..?" he asked, stepping up between Quatre and Hilde.  
  
"'Wh-what's to deny'!?" Hilde gasped, "so... you admit it! You and Quatre... and here I thought it was you and Wufei!"  
  
Duo shrugged, "well yeah... sometimes... Wufei can be more fun than Quatre every once in a while..." he said, slowly. "Cat's too stiff sometimes... never really enjoys playing..."  
  
Hilde's jaw dropped. Playing? PLAYING!? "DUO MAXWELL! HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF SUCH THINGS IN FRONT OF ME!"  
  
Duo blinked, "what?"  
  
"PLAYFUL!? QUATRE!? I think not! It should be obvious...!"  
  
Duo shrugged again, and poked Quatre in his sides. The blonde jumped, and smacked Duo's hands away. "See what I mean...?"  
  
Hilde couldn't believe this! Duo with all four of the other pilots!? It was unbelievable! She brought her hand to her head, feeling dizzy.  
  
Then, she fainted.  
  
***  
  
There was nothing but blackness. Nothing at all. But... there were voices.  
  
"... Why not..?"  
  
"Because, Hilde's right there..."  
  
"She won't see anything..."  
  
A light laugh, "I had no idea you could act like that, Tro-kun..."  
  
A small, almost seductive, chuckle, "you'd be surprised, Duo..."  
  
"I'll bet..." another laugh, this time of disbelief. "What'll the others think?"  
  
"They'll consider me..." Trowa paused, thoughtfully.  
  
"Naughty?"  
  
"... That's one way of putting it..."  
  
Duo laughed again. "No... seriously, you can't..."  
  
"This is a 'we' thing, Duo... it won't be as bad, if you go along with it..."  
  
"Tempting, Tro-kun... but I can't..."  
  
"Why not..?"  
  
"Isn't this where we started..?"  
  
"No... we started with..."  
  
Hilde sat bolt upright. "STOP IT!"  
  
Trowa and Duo both looked at Hilde, in surprise. Duo offered her a grin, "heya Hilde... glad to see you're okay..."  
  
Hilde glared at Trowa, "I'll bet..." she muttered. Trowa smirked.  
  
"Nice greeting..."  
  
Duo scratched the back of his head, "uhhhh, you didn't hear anything, did you?"  
  
"I heard plenty..." Hilde hissed, seething at Trowa. Damn him! Curse his sultry eyes, smooth voice, and seductive nature!  
  
Still with a small smirk, he turned to Duo, "later on, then?" he asked. Duo laughed.  
  
"What part of 'no' is hard for you to take?"  
  
"I'll take it, if it's said the right way..." the green-eyed pilot replied. Then after a quick glance at Hilde, Trowa calmly strided out.  
  
Hilde turned to Duo, seeing him watch Trowa leave. And he was smiling. Then he turned to Hilde. "So, how're you feeling?"  
  
Hilde scowled, "fine..."  
  
"That's good... got kinda worried seeing you fall, so suddenly..."  
  
Hilde sighed, she was never able to stay angry at Duo for very long. She stared at the comforter, silently.  
  
"Hey... are you sure you're okay...? You don't look so good..." Duo said, gently resting his hand on her shoulder, in concern. Hilde looked up at him, seeing the warmth in his cobalt blue eyes.  
  
"Duo..."  
  
"Hm?"  
  
"Your... relationships... with the other pilots... ummm, how're they?"  
  
Duo blinked, confused, then he smiled. "Fine... why do you ask?"  
  
Hilde shook her head, "can you be more specific..?  
  
Duo tapped his chin, thoughtfully. "Well... Wu-chan has lightened up a bit... makes him more fun to play with..." he never noticed Hilde shake her head, in disbelief. "Cat's still shy, but that make things interesting..." he grinned, "it's cute when he wants to ask for..."  
  
Hilde slapped her hand over Duo's mouth, "don't need to specify THAT much..." she said, dryly.  
  
Duo raised an eyebrow. Then he nodded, and pushed her hand aside, "then there's Tro-kun..." he paused, and chuckled. "You wouldn't believe what he just finished suggesting, while you were out..."  
  
Hilde clamped her hands over her ears, "don't wanna hear it!"  
  
Duo blinked, "uhhhh... okay..." he shrugged.  
  
"Ummm, what about Heero?"  
  
"Heero?"  
  
Hilde nodded.  
  
"Well... I miss him... wish he was here now..." he sighed, "but Relena's sometimes more important on his agendas..."  
  
Hilde's eyes widened, tears of empathy welling in her eyes. That's why he went to Wufei, Trowa and Quatre! He was lonely! "I'm here, Duo!" Hilde wanted to shout. But she quickly restrained herself.  
  
Duo smiled, "can't wait for him to get back... things have been kinda weird without him around..."  
  
Hilde nodded, mentally. Weird, as in Wufei, Trowa and Quatre seeing it as their chance to steal you? she thought. No, she couldn't let that happen! Duo was hers! It was part of her deal with Relena.  
  
Hilde crawled up to Duo, and cupped his face in her hands, "Duo..."  
  
Duo blinked, "what?"  
  
"I... I... I want you to know... that, I..." Hilde swallowed, staring into the deep pools of cobalt. "Oh, Duo..." she breathed.  
  
Duo blinked, again, "what... uh, what's wrong, Hilde..?"  
  
Wufei rapped on the door, as he stepped in. He raised an eyebrow at the scene before him. "Am I... interrupting anything?"  
  
Duo got to his feet, "not really, Wu-chan... what's up?"  
  
Wufei shrugged, "dinner's ready..."  
  
"'Not really'?!" Hilde bristled, her ego getting bruised.  
  
"Great, I'm starved" Duo said, with a wide smile.  
  
"So am I..." Wufei said, with a shrug. Duo raised an eyebrow, then grinned.  
  
"And..?"  
  
"And... you'll have to compete with me for a decent meal..." with that, Wufei turned and headed for the dining room.  
  
Duo blinked, then his grin widened. "Hurry up, Hilde..." he said, cheerfully. Then he dashed out, after the Chinese pilot.  
  
Hilde stared after them. Alright. She could figure this out. Duo saw Wufei as a playful lover. Trowa as a more passionate lover. Quatre as the adorable, shy lover. Alright, so Duo liked variety..?  
  
And Heero. Heero was... Duo's... Hilde furrowed her brow. She was stumped. What was Heero?  
  
***  
  
"I'm here to see Relena Peacecraft..."  
  
"Your name..?" Pagen asked, stiffly.  
  
The boy pushed his unruly dark brown hair back. His Prussian blue eyes darkening. "Heero. Heero Yuy..."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
veddy, veddy, VEDDY short chapter v.v at least it seems like it... ah well *shrugs* ^_^()  
  
NO ENDNOTES! it feels kinda empty! ah well, maybe it's a good thing ^_^ just in case, whatever I may have mentioned that belongs to someone else, or some company, isn't... mine... *anime sweatdrops* yeah, it made sense in my head . not anymore, though... 


	6. She Needs a Plan

Disclaimer: nope, not mine... I love repeating it, that's all ^_^ rub it in the lawyer's faces! mwahahahaha!  
  
Warnings: *blinks* suggestive words are spoken... but it's not like that... just kinda... misunderstandings for Hilde's sake ^_^() honest... deathfic..? *grins* who knows..? Rather serious moment is in this one... gomen *bows in apology*  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
It was the next morning, and Quatre had to deal with a rather jumpy, and somewhat obsessive girl.  
  
"Hilde, please!" Quatre pleaded. "Stop imagining things! There is nothing going on between Trowa, Wufei, and Duo!"  
  
"Lies! All lies!" Hilde snapped. She turned to Quatre, her eyes wild, darting back and forth. "I heard them... I see them... I can even smell them!" Okay, so she was exaggerating somewhat. But she could smell their soap, shampoo and such. And that was only if she were really close. But that was beside the point..!  
  
Quatre sighed. "Have you been getting any sleep?" he asked, slowly.  
  
Hilde shook her head. "No... if I sleep, I'll hear them... I'll hear them getting it on...!!!"  
  
Quatre grimaced. Hilde was insane, now. He opened his mouth, ready to try and reassure Hilde there was nothing more than friendship between pilots 02, 03, and 05. Until...  
  
"C' mon, Wu-chan... give it to me!" Duo pleaded.  
  
"No... you shouldn't have said all those things..." Wufei said, sounding impatient.  
  
"What? Last night..? Hey, I was just kidding..."  
  
"Well, it was still a blow to the ego..."  
  
"I'm sorry... but it's true... it was, and is, too big..."  
  
"I happen to like it like that!"  
  
"Wu-chan, c' mon... it looks kinda scary that way..."  
  
"It's not like I can do anything about it..!"  
  
"They have specialists now..."  
  
"No, I won't... you don't like it, too bad... deal with it..."  
  
"You like to see me in pain, don't you...?"  
  
"Duo..."  
  
"No, hey, it's no big deal... it's yours, not mine..." then footsteps. Duo was walking away, now.  
  
"Duo... wait..." Wufei's steps running after him. "I'll... okay, fine... who is this specialist..?"  
  
"Really?! Hey great, Wu-chan! Things'll be better this way, trust me!"  
  
"I am..."  
  
"Cool, let's go to your room, and we'll figure things out from there..!"  
  
A small laugh came from Wufei. Then they were walking away. Hilde was white as a sheet. Her eyes wide, her jaw dropped. She whirled around to face Quatre, "TELL ME YOU HEARD ALL THAT!"  
  
Quatre shrugged, "that discussion's been going on for a while now..."  
  
Hilde balled her hands into fists, "AND IT DOESN'T BOTHER YOU!?"  
  
Quatre shrugged, again. "It's not my place to say anything..."  
  
Hilde let out a scream of anguish, and stormed away.  
  
Then Duo walked into the kitchen. "Hey Duo... how'd it go?" Quatre asked, with a smile.  
  
"Went fine, Cat... I convinced Wufei to let me take that ghastly eyesore of a shirt of his to a taylor, to get it fitted..."  
  
Quatre laughed, "I hope you don't call it that, in front of him..."  
  
"I had to... that shirt hurts my eyes, I told him last night..."  
  
"If it hurts your eyes, then why are you getting it fitted for him..?"  
  
Duo shrugged, "he seems to really like it... and if I get it fitted for him, there'll be less material to look at..." Duo winked, as he grinned, "or maybe they can lighten the color a bit..." He grabbed the phonebook, and headed back upstairs.  
  
Quatre laughed, "always with the angles, huh, Duo?"  
  
"Better believe it..." Duo called.  
  
***  
  
"Relena, I can't do this!" Hilde hissed into the phone.  
  
"Why not!?"  
  
"Because! I have way more competition than YOU originally thought!"  
  
"What do you mean!?"  
  
"I can't possibly compete with Trowa, Wufei, AND Quatre!"  
  
"WHAAT!?"  
  
"It's like this... Trowa has this whole seductive thing goin on, which Duo seems to really, REALLY like! And Wufei, well... he's not as cool and collected as we thought, apparently he's playful, in the sack! And Duo likes that! And there's Quatre! Duo likes his shyness! IT'S ALL TOO MUCH, RELENA!"  
  
"Quiet, Hilde! Don't yell my name! Those guys can't know you're with me..."  
  
"I showed up in a pink limo! I think it's kind of obvious!"  
  
"Anyone see it?"  
  
"I dunno!"  
  
"Then, see!?"  
  
"Miss Relena..." Pagen's voice said, slowly.  
  
"Pagen, I'm on the phone..."  
  
"Male caller..."  
  
"Tell him to wait..."  
  
"Messy brown hair, 'bluest of blue' eyes..."  
  
CLANG! Hilde cringed, holding the phone away from her ear. "Ow! RELENA, DON'T DROP THE PHONE! Relena..?"  
  
Running footsteps.  
  
Then Pagen spoke, "she's running to greet her caller..."  
  
Click.  
  
Hilde scowled, "damnit, Relena!" she growled. Then she slammed the phone down, and started pacing. She had to think. She had to think of something.  
  
***  
  
Relena rushed down the hall, and looked into the foyer. "Heero!" she gasped, her eyes wide, seeing Heero, standing at the door, looking very good in a black button-down shirt over a blue tanktop, and black jeans. His eyes were cold and hard. But Relena ignored that.  
  
"Heero..."  
  
"Relena..."  
  
Relena ran down the stairs, ready to embrace the man who came all this way to be with her! Only to get a 9mm aimed directly at her forehead. Heero's eyes narrowed.  
  
"I've had it with you, Relena... I'm sick of you obsessing over me... I only saved your life because you were the only person capable of bringing peace... and just because I know of your skills, doesn't mean I'm in love you, I'm merely acknowleding them..."  
  
Relena's eyes widened, her pupils shrinking[1]. "Heero..?"  
  
"Say my name one more time..." Heero growled.  
  
"I... I don't understand... Everything that happened... in space..?"  
  
"You wouldn't listen... I assumed if you were closer, you would accept that I had to fight..."  
  
Relena swallowed, "Hee..."  
  
Heero undid the safety catch of the gun, the satisfying click practically daring Relena to finish the word, the name, she tried to say.  
  
"Why!? Why're you doing this!?" Relena screeched.  
  
"Because! You won't take 'no' for an answer!" Heero shouted. A rare occurance. His eyes flashed, "I don't love you, Relena! Never have, never will... I have no intention of living out the rest of this peaceful time by your side... I'm with the person I want to be with..."  
  
"Who... Who... Hee..." Relena paused, remembering the gun. "Who, then..?"  
  
"Duo... Duo Maxwell... I am here to kill you, Relena... because you keep interfering with my happiness, and I want you to stop..."  
  
"But... I do love you!"  
  
Heero's eyes turned hard, "if you did, you would want me to be happy... Duo makes me happy..."  
  
"IT'S NOT FAIR! I MET YOU FIRST!!!"  
  
Heero's eyes widened, "what!? You met me first!?!?" he then started to laugh. A low taunting, scoffing laugh. He looked at her, with a small smirk, "that's hardly the issue, here..."  
  
"Miss Relena..?"  
  
"Pagen! Call... call security... Duo Maxwell drove Hee... HIM to insanity..." Relena said, slowly.  
  
Heero frowned. "Pagen, touch the phone, call for help, do whatever... give me a reason to shoot her..." he challenged. Not taking his eyes off the pacifist. Pagen never moved, shrugging.  
  
"Wanna know why I didn't kill Duo...? He was a liability, Relena... he was expendable, and he knew it... yet even when I went to kill him, he was smiling at me... expecting it. That's when I realized how strong my feelings for him actually were... he was strong, Relena... he did have his weak moments, but he hid it under a cheerful mask."  
  
"Wh-when did you...?"  
  
"When did I start caring for him..?"  
  
Relena nodded, slowly.  
  
"When he rescued me... got me out of the OZ hospital... He didn't have to... but he did..."  
  
"So, it's just a game of favors..."  
  
"No, Relena! He did it because he wanted to become friends, allies, with me! It was his persistance, his energy, his smile that made me want to live! You did nothing! You did nothing for me! Can you accept it now?!"  
  
"No! I refuse..." Relena sniffed, looking away.  
  
Heero narrowed his eyes, "then... omae o korosu."  
  
***  
  
"There! See, looks better on you, don't it!?" Duo said, cheerfully. Wufei frowned, and tugged at the sleeves.  
  
"It's too small..."  
  
"What? C' mon, Wu-chan... it fits you just right..."  
  
"Doesn't mean I like it..."  
  
"Wu-chan...!"  
  
"Sorry, Duo..."  
  
Trowa grinned, as he watched the scene unfold from the door.  
  
"Fine, fine... where'd you get it? I'll buy you another one..." Duo said, impatiently.  
  
"No, you already had this fitted... it's enough... thank you..." Wufei said, with a shrug.  
  
"Too bad! If you don't like it, then take it off..."  
  
"Duo..."  
  
"No! Take it off..."  
  
"Not now, okay?"  
  
"Damnit, Wu-chan! Take it off! I haven't got all day!"  
  
"Have you no patience?!"  
  
"Not when you're involved! Now take it off!"  
  
Trowa started to laugh, as Duo leapt at Wufei. Both were rolling around on the floor. Duo tugging at the shirt, Wufei trying to hold him off.  
  
"TAKE IT OFF!"  
  
"I said no!"  
  
"Wufei!"  
  
"Why now!!??"  
  
"Because, you weren't satisfied with THIS outcome!"  
  
Trowa grinned, then he blinked, and glanced down, at Hilde. Oops, he thought. Then he bit his lip, the look on her face. It was priceless!  
  
"OMIGOD!!!" Hilde screamed.  
  
Duo and Wufei froze, and looked over at Hilde. "Hey Hilde..." Duo greeted, slowly, stradling Wufei and still holding his shirt. Wufei blinked.  
  
"YOU'RE EXHIBITIONISTS!?!?!"  
  
"Huh!?"  
  
Hilde pointed at Trowa, "FOR HIM, EVEN!!!???"  
  
"Hey, Hilde... waitasec, whatever you're thinking, it's not what it looks like..." Duo said, slowly. Hilde barely heard him, as she glared at Trowa.  
  
"YOU PERVERT!" she yelled.  
  
Trowa shrugged, with a small smirk, "gotta get my kicks, somehow..." he said, in a low seductive voice. Hilde released another scream of anguish, and stormed off.  
  
Duo blinked, and sat up, scratching his head, "what's with her?"  
  
Trowa and Wufei shrugged. "Who knows..?" they both said, curtly. Duo blinked, and didn't notice the small grin between his fellow pilots.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
[1] heh, I think people know the expression I'm referring to... yep, 'scared/confused Relena', that very annoying, and ugly expression... ugh! heh, I'm an anti-Relena supporter ^_^()  
  
***~~~***  
  
Nanaki: ooh, angsty-ish!  
  
Nanashi: *anime sweatdrops* was that angst!?!?!  
  
Nanaki: *shrugs* any endnotes?  
  
Nanashi: I WROTE ANGST!?!?!?!?  
  
Nanaki: take that as a "no"... sorry for the long wait, people... Nanashi hit a BIG slump this time! *nods*  
  
Nanashi: WAS THAT ANGST!?!?!?  
  
Nanaki: *shrugs and waves around her almighty spoon of hentai* LONG LIVE 5+2!!! WAI! ^_^  
  
Nanashi: IT WAS ANGST, WASN'T IT!?!? 


	7. Drastic Measures

YES!!! AN UPDATE!!! DAMNIT THIS TOOK ME HOW LONG!?!?!?!? *blinks* so long, I don't even remember *sighs* sorry for the long wait... really, I am... I think my other fics aren't faring against the slumps any better... anywho...  
  
Disclaimer: *blinks* there are lucky people who DO own Gundam Wing and its characters... unfortunately, I'm not one of them *sighs*  
  
Warnings: once I figure 'em out, they'll be at the end of the chapter *snickers* just kidding... some language, I'm afraid... gomen v.v  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Heero narrowed his eyes, his finger slowly applying pressure to the trigger. Relena continued to stare at him, terrified. Then she sqeezed her eyes shut. A smirk appeared on Heero's face, as he raised the gun, then...  
  
BANG  
  
Relena screamed, and fell.  
  
WHACK  
  
THUMP  
  
"Miss Relena!!!" Pagen gasped.  
  
Heero raised an eyebrow. Then he calmly dropped the gun, as he turned and walked off the overly pink premises. It was over.  
  
For the time being.  
  
~~~***~~~  
  
The three Gundam pilots were seated in the kitchen, each doing their own thing. Wufei was reading the newspaper, finishing off his lunch. Quatre was writing letters to 14 of his sisters, since he wrote the others yesterday. Which did take a while, mind you. Trowa stole the comics from Wufei's newspaper, which he was reading at that moment, as he ate an apple.  
  
And Duo? He was swimming peacefully in the pool. And he was checked on often, by the others, through the sliding glass door.  
  
Then, out of the blue, Hilde leapt into the kitchen, brandishing one of Wufei's katanas. The pilots blinked.  
  
"Hilde?" Quatre asked, slowly.  
  
Wufei's eyes flashed, "is that mine!?" he demanded.  
  
"YOU SHOULD KNOW TO HIDE YOUR WEAPONS BETTER, YOU OVER-SEXED ANIMAL!" Hilde yelled.  
  
Wufei raised an eyebrow. Quatre blinked, then glanced at Wufei.  
  
"What'd she call you?"  
  
"An over-sexed animal..." Trowa answered, a small smile appearing on his face. Quatre furrowed his brow.  
  
"Why would she call Wufei that?"  
  
"I HAVE MY REASONS! AND YOU, WIPE THAT SMILE OFF YOUR FACE, YOU HORNY BEAST!!!" Hilde shouted, pointing the katana at Trowa.  
  
Wufei and Trowa glanced at each other.  
  
The Arabian gaped at Hilde. Then he turned at pilots 03 and 05... and burst out laughing. Wufei and Trowa blinked, in confusion, that Quatre was actually laughing.  
  
"What's so funny?" they asked.  
  
Quatre started to laugh harder. Then he fell back, out of his chair and hit the floor, his laughter still rising off the floor. His fellow pilots leaned over, to see him on the floor.  
  
"Quatre?" Trowa asked, slowly.  
  
"You feeling alright, Winner?" Wufei asked, dryly.  
  
Hilde ignored Quatre, and continued to glare at Wufei and Trowa.  
  
The blonde sat up, still grinning, his cheeks damp from his tears of mirth. "Nice petnames, you guys... what do you call Hilde?" he asked.  
  
Three faces fell, as they stared at Quatre in disbelief.  
  
"WHAT!?"  
  
His grin widened, "I had no idea the three of you were together... jealousy is a terrible thing, isn't it?"  
  
"WE'RE NOT TOGETHER!" the three of them snapped.  
  
"ESPECIALLY WITH THE LIKES OF..." they went on, in unison.  
  
"... HER!" Wufei and Trowa spat.  
  
"... THEM!" Hilde said, at the exact same time. Then Duo stepped into the kitchen, wiping his arms dry. Quatre sighed, as the American's soakedness dripped all over the floor.  
  
"Duo..." he started to scold.  
  
"Duo!!!" Hilde gasped, as she threw the katana aside.  
  
"AUGH!" the other pilots screamed, and ducked to avoid the very airbourne, not to mention, the very sharp blade.  
  
Hilde ignored them and leapt at Duo, latching her arms around his slender waist, in a tight embrace.  
  
Duo blinked, "yeah?"  
  
Trowa and Wufei straightened up, watching Hilde as if she were crazy. Then they glanced at each other, and nodded.  
  
"Hilde! Hands off!" they both ordered.  
  
"Never!" Hilde spat, holding Duo tighter.  
  
"Uhhh, Hilde, lack of air isn't healthy..." Duo said, slowly. He blinked, looking up, just in time to see Wufei lunge at him, knocking him off his feet.  
  
"ACK!" Duo yelped.  
  
Trowa grabbed Hilde's ankles, and held her back. "GO!" he barked. Wufei nodded, scooping up Duo, and dashed down out of the kitchen, down the hall, then up the stairs.  
  
"Wu-chan!? What the hell!?" Duo asked, confused.  
  
Wufei ignored him.  
  
"YOU BEAST! HOW DARE YOU TAKE HIM TO YOUR CESSPOOL OF A BEDROOM!" Hilde shouted, as she chased after them. Duo blinked again, 'cesspool of a bedroom'? What was she talking about?  
  
"TROWA!" Wufei shouted.  
  
Trowa was chasing Hilde, "SHE KICKED ME IN THE HEAD, ALRIGHT!?" he snapped. "ONE CAN'T EXACTLY KEEP A GOOD GRIP WHEN THAT HAPPENS!"  
  
"Call yourself a Gundam pilot..." Wufei grumbled.  
  
"I heard that!" Trowa spat.  
  
"Wu-chan... I think I'm missin something..." Duo said, slowly.  
  
Wufei rolled his eyes, "what gives you that idea?" he asked, sarcastically.  
  
"Well... you're carrying me... Hilde's chasing you, thinking you're taking me to your room... to do who knows what..."  
  
Wufei's face reddened.  
  
Duo smirked, "and she actually kicked Trowa, just to start chasing us, us being you... so, what's going on?" he asked.  
  
"Something..." Wufei answered.  
  
With a shrieking battlecry, and a last ditch attempt, Hilde launched herself at Wufei, tackling him from behind.  
  
"ACK!" pilots 02 and 05 tumbled to the floor. Then Duo was grabbed, and thrown awkwardly over Hilde's shoulder in a very uncomfortable fireman's carry. Then she started to trot away.  
  
Trowa walked up to Wufei, and pulled him to his feet. "So..."  
  
"So..." Wufei echoed.  
  
"Should we go after her...?" Trowa asked, looking rather deadpan.  
  
Hilde was definitely trying to run. But it looked more like very slow scurrying. She wasn't necessarily getting anywhere. And Duo was was really weighing the small girl down.  
  
"Uhhh, Hilde... I do know how to walk..." he said, slowly.  
  
"No, love... I can do this..." Hilde grunted, "I'll protect you... from those... sex-crazed lunatics... whom... you call... friends... and... comrades..." the floor was slowly getting closer, as she continue trying to walk.  
  
Duo blinked, "love...?" He glanced back at Trowa and Wufei, "guys...?"  
  
"Yeah?" they asked, calmly striding up, behind them.  
  
"What is she talking about?"  
  
Trowa and Wufei managed a small smirk and a shrug.  
  
"NO! GET AWAY, YOU BEASTS!!! Hilde shouted, trying to speed up, now practically crouching as she tried to 'run' from the two other pilots. Whom managed to easily keep up.  
  
"Can you stop calling us that?" Wufei asked, with a scowl.  
  
"It is kinda rude..." Trowa agreed.  
  
"I'll protect... my koi..." Hilde wheezed. That was that, she collapsed fully on the floor. Duo still in her grasp. Duo blinked, he was now just laying on top of her. With a shrug, the braided boy got to his feet, and lifted up Hilde.  
  
"What're you doing?" Trowa asked.  
  
"Poor girl's lost it... she needs serious rest..." Duo replied, and started carrying her to her room. With a shrug, Trowa and Wufei followed.  
  
"When did you become her koi, Duo?" Wufei asked, with a small smirk. Duo shrugged.  
  
"It's news to me... maybe she landed on her head..." he mumbled. Then he frowned, slightly, "she used to be more normal than this... I wonder what made her change..."  
  
Trowa and Wufei couldn't help but share a small grin.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Very short chapter... gomen, but I'm glad I even got a chapter out at all *blinks* I hope it was decent, enough... unlike the others... *bangs her head against her desk * damnit! damnit! damnit! I hate slumps!!! *gets a headache* ow... I think one of my slumps is a REALLY big one, too... ugh! . I'M STARTING TO LACK IN HUMOUR!!!  
  
... I'm also hungry... *blinks* popcorn!!! *runs away* 


	8. Welcome Home?

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters are NOT mine.

Warnings: I have no idea. Definitely OOCness, and possibly language, I can't really tell. It's been a while, so it's gonna be a little weird, I think. 22 months. O.o;; Uh, so I tried to make it a long chapter, sorta like a 'sorry' kinda thing. Heh.

* * *

"She's insane... Hilde's insane..." Quatre said, shaking his head, with a small sigh. At the moment he and Duo were in the kitchen, doing the dishes.

Duo furrowed his brow, as he dried the plates for the Arabian, and started stacking them in the cupboards. "I wonder what happened..." he mumbled.

"... Well..." Quatre said, slowly. "She was almost hit over the head with a vase..."

Duo blinked, turning to him, "what? When?"

"Couple days ago..." Quatre handed Duo a bowl.

"By who?" the American prodded, drying the bowl.

Quatre fidgeted slightly, while washing the utensils. "Umm... well, I... uhhh, so, Duo... how have you been?" he asked, with a cheerful smile.

Duo frowned, leaning against the counter, "Cat..."

Quatre swallowed, "heh, what?"

"What're you hiding?"

"Nothing."

"Cat..."

"Honestly, Duo... I don't lie, or keep secrets... I swear."

Duo pursed his lips for a second, then nodded slowly. "Uhhh, alright then... sorry."

Quatre nodded, handing Duo some forks and spoons. "No problem... so where is Hilde, anyways?" he asked, curiously.

Duo shrugged, drying the utensils, "in her room, getting some rest..."

The Arabian nodded, "that's a relief... rest will help ease her mind..."

"... Yeah..." Duo smiled. "I hope."

**oooXXXooo**

While Duo and Quatre were finishing up their task, Trowa and Wufei were in the middle of theirs. They stood at the foot of Hilde's bed. And the girl was sleeping soundly, snoring lightly. Constantly murmuring weird phrases and words.

"Kinky..."

"... He'll be mine..."

"Horny beasts must die..."

Wufei pursed his lips for a moment, in vague concern for the young lady's mental health, then he turned to Trowa, "any ideas?"

"... She obviously has issues..." Trowa replied, shortly.

Wufei gave him a small glare, "I meant for our next course of action..."

Trowa raised an eyebrow, "oh..." Then he shrugged, glancing at the window, smiling faintly. "I think her mattress will fit out the window..." he said, almost cheerfully.

Wufei frowned, "I said 'no', Barton..."

"Why not?!"

"Because, it's illogical, and morally wrong..."

"Who's to say we'll get caught?"

"Getting caught isn't what bothers me... it's illogical..."

"... 'And morally wrong'... I heard, I heard..." Trowa rolled his eyes. "Why is it morally wrong, anyways?"

"Duo wouldn't approve..." Wufei muttered.

"Aww, Wufei, that's almost cute of you..."

"... Shut up."

Trowa grinned slightly. "C' mon, Wufei... it won't be that hard... you take one side, I'll take the other... I highly doubt she'd hurt herself... It's only two floors."

"She wouldn't be hurting _herself_..." Wufei snorted, "_we'll_ be hurting her, because _we'll_ be throwing her out... and she isn't like us, she's a weak onna..."

Trowa waved his hand, carelessly, "mere details... let's do it, that's all."

"..... You're a persistant one..."

"That mean you're up for it?" Trowa asked, almost eagerly.

Wufei shook his head, "what do you take me for?"

**oooXXXooo**

It was all dark. Hilde was in a haze, but didn't move. There were some voices. Soft, serious sounding voices. Furrowing her brow, Hilde tried to hear a little better. She kind of recognized the voices. Kind of.

"That mean you're up for it?"

"What do you take me for?"

"... It's just a little bit of fun, Wufei..."

"I don't consider straining ourselves 'fun'..."

"I work in the circus, I don't strain easily... I pride myself in my great stamina..."

"As well as your modesty, no doubt..."

"That too..."

"I don't want to do anything that may hurt Duo..."

"Like she would anything to hurt him..."

"That wasn't what I meant... Duo's a little odd, either he'll be incredibly angry at us... or he might be _upset_ that we left him out of something like this..."

"We'll make it up to him, later tonight..."

".... Damn... how much stamina do you have, Barton?"

"Told you... a lot."

"... Fine... but no window."

"... You're a real downer, you know that?"

"I'm working on it..."

"Then what...?"

"I'm sure you'll think of something... you're disturbingly creative."

"... You flatter me... alright, let's do it."

"You're far too eager..."

Then she felt the bed beginning to move. Hilde sat bolt upright, eyes wide in horror. "OMIGOD!!! IN MY ROOM! YOU GUYS ARE MORE TWISTED THAN I THOUGHT!!!" Then she blinked, as Trowa and Wufei looked at her oddly. Wufei was on the right side of the bed, Trowa on the left, and both of them were holding up the mattress.

"WHAT'RE YOU DOING!?" Hilde shouted.

Trowa dropped his side, rubbing the back of his head, smiling innocently, "nothing..."

Due to Trowa's action and Wufei still holding up his side, Hilde then rolled down off the bed, hitting the floor with a THUD, at Trowa's feet.

Trowa blinked, as he looked down at her, while Wufei bit his lip to keep from laughing, as he lowered his side of the mattress.

Hilde jumped to her feet, her eyes darting wildly from side to side, hair a mess, and her legs tangled in the sheets, as she struggled to keep her balance. "YOU'RE BOTH INSANE!"

Trowa had to bite back a smile, "no offense, but you're the one looking like a psychopath..."

"YOU BOTH MUST DIE!!!" Hilde suddenly yelled.

Trowa and Wufei blinked in confusion, as Hilde darted from the room, staggering and kicking her legs to discard the bedsheet that held her. Wufei walked around the bed, joining Trowa.

"Perhaps you're right... she does appear to have some issues..." the Chinese pilot said, slowly.

Trowa nodded, "told you..."

Then a moment later Hilde was back, swinging another one of Wufei's katanas around.

"... I really should install a lock on my bedroom door..." Wufei growled. Trowa could only smile in agreement. Hilde released a shrill battlecry, and lunged at the pilots.

Both pilots looked at each other, then sidestepped away from each other. Hilde leaping between the two of them, landing on the bed. She was stabbing at the bed, shrieking that Duo was hers, and hers alone!

Trowa and Wufei stared at the sight, stunned. The poor bed was being slaughtered, if it were alive, that is.

"HE'S MINE, HE'S MINE, HE'S MIIIIINE!!"

Both pilots gave each other a perplexed look. Then shrugged helplessly. Maybe they did too good a job?

"Hilde!"

Trowa and Wufei blinked again, as Quatre raced in. He grabbed her wrists, wrenching her back, off the bed, and down to the floor.

"ACK...!" Hilde yelped.

Quatre snatched the katana from her hands, "what're you thinking?"

"KILL THE PILOTS! HE'S MINE!!!" she shrieked, struggling madly.

"... Maybe OZ got to her..." Trowa suggested. Wufei nodded.

Then Duo casually sauntered by the bedroom door. Only to lean back, and peer in, looking very confused. Hilde was on the floor, Quatre holding her wrists. Trowa and Wufei watching. Raising an eyebrow, the American walked in, joining the edge of the fray. "Exhibition, huh?" he joked.

"... Yeah," Trowa and Wufei nodded solemnly.

Quatre turned red, "no..!" he cried.

"KILL THE PILOTS!" Hilde shrieked. Duo blinked. Kill the pilots?

"Hey, Hilde... you okay?"

Hilde looked around wildly. Her eyes landing on Duo, "DUO!" she gasped. Then tears sprang to her blue eyes, "please... help..."

Duo walked up, kneeling beside Quatre, as he pulled Hilde close. Trowa and Wufei's eyes widened, in shock. Or horror. It was a little hard to decide at the moment.

Quatre blinked, as Hilde curled up, snuggling into Duo's chest.

"... There's a good girl... shhh, it's alright... I'm here..." Duo said soothingly, as he smoothed her hair down, smiling warmly.

Hilde clutched at his black shirt, whimpering.

"Shhhh, there there... everything's going to be just fine..." Duo continued to murmur gently. "I think you need some air, don't you?"

Hilde nodded, trying to nuzzle further into Duo's embrace.

Duo stood up, still holding Hilde tenderly. "Alright... let's get you some shoes, and we'll take a walk, okay?" he cooed. "How about we go to the park?"

Hilde nodded, smiling contently, as Duo gently lead her to the bedroom door. Quatre shrugged, and stood up, following after the pair.

Trowa and Wufei stared after them, still very much astonished at what just happened. Then they looked at each other. And they both wordlessly agreed that this wasn't good.

**oooXXXooo**

Heero sighed, as he stepped off the train, smiling faintly. He was almost home. Almost back to Duo. A bit of a goofy grin lit up his usual stoic expression as he thought about the American.

Shouldering his backpack, he made his way to the front of the station, quickly waving down a cab. And he was off. Thoughts of Duo continued to make the Japanese pilot smile almost pleasantly, so the driver wasn't fearing for his life.

Until Heero suddenly thought about a certain young blue-eyed woman. Hilde Schbeiker. 01's eyes then darkened, almost dangerously.

Any sense of security the poor driver was beginning to have quickly vanished, at the sudden homicidal glint in his passenger's gaze.

Heero's hands gripped into tight fists on his lap, the more he thought on that damn woman. Setting his jaw, he quickly shook his head, trying to will away the unsettling feeling that was beginning to form in his chest. _No, things are fine_, he decided. _Trowa and Wufei are dependable_.

Aren't they?

Heero scowled, and shook his head more firmly. _Alright, no having doubts_, he chided himself. _It will only makes things unnecessarily difficult_.

**oooXXXooo**

Once again, sitting in the den were Trowa and Wufei. Trowa's brow was furrowed very deeply, it almost looked painful, while Wufei was pacing back and forth, looking very very uncomfortable. Suddenly he turned to Trowa.

"Well?!"

Trowa bit his lip, then forced a smile, "'well' what?"

"Well, what are we doing?!" Wufei demanded.

"Uhhh... well, I'm sitting here, and you're on the verge of a nervous breakdown..." Trowa smiled.

Wufei growled, and lunged at the taller pilot, grabbing his collar, and pulled him roughly over the desk. "Don't make stupid jokes in this sort of situation, Barton!" he growled, darkly.

Trowa cringed, "hey, I'm just trying to lighten things up."

"Things shouldn't be lightened up at this moment!" Wufei snapped. "Duo pities Hilde, and that evil onna is using it to her advantage!"

Trowa shifted slightly, trying to find a comfortable position, since he was yanked across the heavy desk; his legs were still on the desk, but Wufei was holding his upper body up over the floor. "Uhh, well we could... uh... I still say the bed-out-the-window is a good option," Trowa said, simply.

Wufei gaped at him, almost stunned. Then with a grimace, he threw his hands up in obvious exasperation. "You're impossible, Barton!!"

"Ack!" Trowa yelped, as he was dropped to the floor.

Suddenly Wufei whipped his head around, his onyx black eyes widening. It sounded like a car was approaching. "Oh hell no..." he hissed almost to himself.

Meanwhile, Trowa had to pull the rest of himself down to the floor, to stand up. "Ugh, flexible or not, I'm not made of rubber, Wufei..." he griped.

"Shut up!"

Trowa blinked, "what's your problem?"

"I said 'shut up'!" Wufei barked.

Trowa raised an eyebrow, but went silent anyway. Then a very ominous sound reached his ears as well. The sound of a vehicle's engine, and the sound of a car door closing.

Forest green eyes widened, horror written on his usually calm features. "Oh shhhhhi...taki mushrooms!!" he yelled, running to the window, Wufei at his heels.

Both pilots stared down below in terror. A yellow cab was in their driveway. And getting out of that yellow cab was their leader-of-sorts.

"What do we do?" Wufei whispered.

Trowa opened and closed his mouth several times.

"Barton..?"

Trowa continued to open and close his mouth, making no sound.

"Barton!" Wufei hollered, and grabbed Trowa's shirt, and began shaking him around violently. "Enough! Say something, you idiot! Say something right now! What do we do? What do we do? What do we _DO_?!?!"

Trowa could only flop bonelessly around, his mouth still managing to make no sound.

"Barton! Answer me! Answer me, damnit! Barton, I swear if you don't answer me...!" Wufei was now in a full-on panic. Heero was making his way to the frontdoor!

"... Wu-u-u-f-ei-ei-ei-ei-ei... s-s-s-s-s-s-t-op-op-op-op-op w-ith-ith-ith th-e-e-e d-amn-amn-amn sh-sh-sh-sh-a-k-ing-ing-ing...!" Trowa finally yelled, rather shakily. He reached up, and roughly pushed Wufei away.

Wufei blinked, "oh, sorry..."

Trowa smoothed down his shirt. "Alright, now... we need to keep calm," he said, firmly.

Wufei nodded.

"We have to think logically..."

Wufei nodded again.

"We fought in very epic battles, so cowardice should not be in our vocabulary...!" Trowa went on.

Wufei took a deep breath, and nodded firmly.

"We fought in a war, without fearing death _at all_, am I right?"

"Yes, you're right," Wufei nodded, almost vigorously.

"We're Gundam pilots! We fear nothing!" Trowa said, standing with pride.

Wufei pursed his lips, then took a long calming breath. He flinched, managing to hear the front door of the mansion close.

"Trowa, Wufei? Anyone home..?" Heero's voice called.

"Except Heero is the exception...!" Trowa gulped. Then he spun around, jumping up on the windowsill, and started trying to open the window.

"Barton, you idiot!" Wufei growled. Then he quickly jumped up on the windowsill and started trying to jar open the window as well.

After a moment, there was a familiar voice, "Trowa, Wufei..."

Trowa and Wufei froze.

Heero was standing at the door, his eyebrow raised. It was a strange sight seeing both of his fellow stoic pilots standing on a windowsill, wiggling and jiggling trying to open the large window.

"What are you doing?" Heero asked, suspiciously.

Trowa forced a smile, "Heero... heh, you're back early..."

Wufei gulped, but managed to nod a greeting to the Japanese pilot. Then he wordlessly went back to trying to open the window.

"What are you doing?" Heero repeated, lowering his backpack to the floor.

"Uh, n-nothing... we were just, uh... just, uh..." Trowa looked around almost frantically, then he sharply elbowed Wufei's side. "Wufei, what are we doing...?"

"Trying to avoid death..." Wufei grunted, still trying to open the window.

Trowa anime sweatdropped, as Heero stared at the both of them, obviously questioning their sanity.

"Avoid death?" Heero asked.

"Uhhhhhhh, d-d-death... Duo! Heh, we're trying to avoid Duo!" Trowa choked out.

Heero frowned, "and why is that?"

"We, uh... we, uh... Wufei, uh..."

Heero's frown deepened, and he took a few very menacing steps forward. "What did Wufei do to Duo...?" he asked, narrowing his eyes.

"... I didn't do anything!" Wufei snapped.

"Then why are you avoiding him!?" Heero demanded.

Trowa's eyes widened, seeing that Heero's trigger finger was twitching again. So much for the therapy sessions.

"Not what you think, Heero!" Trowa said, quickly. "Just, uh... he, uh... Wufei and Duo just got in an argument... about, uh... about, uh... penguins!"

"Penguins?" Heero blinked.

Wufei anime sweatdropped, "penguins?"

Trowa nodded, "heh, right... penguins... y' know... Duo was a little hyper, and, uh... Wufei was the only one around, so Duo started an argument, and uh... it got a little ugly, so, uh... yeah... how was your trip?"

Heero's hand steadied a bit, "it was fine." He looked around, back to his calm neutral self, "where is Duo, anyways?" he asked.

"With Hilde... in the park," Wufei answered mindlessly, as he continued working on the window.

Trowa could only make an 'erk' sound as Heero's face suddenly darkened. Wufei froze, realizing what he just said. Slowly, he turned around, looking at Heero.

It was silent for a very long moment. At least it felt long for pilots 03 and 05. They could almost hear something snap in Heero's head.

The Japanese pilot then swiftly made his way across the den, and leaned down, resting his hands against the coffeetable. Trowa and Wufei swallowed nervously.

"... I trust you two to take care of Duo while I'm gone, and you _let_ that woman make off with him?!" Heero shouted, in rage. He lifted the coffeetable over his head. "Can't I count on you guys for anything?!" He spun around, eyes flashing dangerously as he hurled the coffeetable at the two pilots.

Trowa and Wufei yelped in unison, as they jumped down from the windowsill, ducking simultaneously, to avoid the flying table. The window was almost smashed to nothing, as the poor table sailed through it, way too easily. Trowa and Wufei both quickly dashed to the other side of the den, away from the window, and behind a couch.

"Yuy, calm down!" Wufei was hollering.

"Calm down..?" Heero echoed, eyes widening. Then his eyes darkened, as he made his way over to the couch. "Calm down?! You expect me to _calm down_?! You're an idiot, Chang, if you think I should calm down! A huge, dumb, boneheaded, moronic schmuck..!!!"

"... Injustice! You have no right to speak to me like that!" Wufei snapped, scowling as he stood up.

Then Trowa hastily pulled Wufei back down. Just as a vase crashed loudly into the wall, where Wufei was standing a split-second earlier.

"Shut up, Wufei... better to let him wear himself out..." Trowa hissed. "Just cower like a good little boy."

Wufei looked aghast. Then he stood up abruptly, "I am a warrior! I do _not_ cower!"

Klick. The sound of a safety catch releasing on a 9mm. Wufei knew the sound well. He slowly turned his gaze back forward, and found himself staring down the barrel of Heero's prized weapon.

"... Uh, maybe just this once..." Wufei muttered. Then he dropped back to the floor, and covered his head, cowering. Trowa nodded in approval, and began cowering with his comrade.

"I can't believe you idiots! I can't believe this! Why?! Why can't I depend on you two!? Answer me that!!" Heero ranted, prussian blue eyes flashing murderously.

"We didn't know what to do, Heero, really..." Trowa blurted, hastily. "It just kinda happened, uh... and well, maybe we got a little carried away, that's all..."

"A little carried away?" Heero blinked. "A little carried with _what_?! Baka no yarou!" He snarled, and dropped his gun, grabbing a conveniently placed side table, and raised it over his head, preparing to drop it against Trowa's head.

Trowa cringed, until...

"Heero? Ack! Heero, no..!" Quatre suddenly appeared, and started tugging the table down, to Trowa and Wufei's immense relief. "Whatever's wrong, can you _please_ restrain from destroying the place...!?"

Heero growled at Quatre, "you! I should have made you do it! You're dependable, unlike these schmucks, correct?"

"Stop calling me a schmuck!" Wufei yelled.

"Then quit being one!" Heero shot back.

Quatre anime sweatdropped, then looked at Trowa in confusion. The acrobat shook his head, not bothering to try and explain since he was trying to calm himself down. With a sigh, the Arabian turned back to Heero.

"Heero, what's wrong?" he asked in a soothing tone, resting his hand against Heero's shoulder.

"These two! They're idiots!" Heero spat, pointing at Trowa and Wufei.

"... Well, at least he stopped with the 'schmucks' term..." Trowa said, sighing. Wufei glowered at him.

"You have no right to talk..! He only called you a schmuck once... I was called a schmuck _twice_... so shut up."

Trowa blinked, then snickered, until Quatre gave both of the older pilots a warning glare. "Boys, I brought home dinner, it's on the table... get going," he commanded, still using one hand to successfully keep Heero from going on another rampage.

"Wha...? But, Quatre... can you handle him..?" Trowa said slowly.

"Yes... now, get going..." Quatre replied, sternly.

Wufei nodded as he hastily got to his feet, and started shoving Trowa out of the room, rather quickly.

Quatre sighed, shaking his head. Then he gave Heero a warm smile. "Well, Heero... you and your dramatic entrances... that was quite the return you've made."

Heero glanced at the younger pilot, then frowned as he felt himself calm down. Damn Quatre's tranquil nature! It was impossible to be angry around him!

Quatre looked at the broken window, "so you broke a window..."

Heero blinked, noticing the shattered glass. Then he stared at the floor, "yeah."

"With a coffeetable."

Heero shuffled his right foot, a little uncomfortably, "yeah."

"Now, you know that wasn't the right thing to do."

"... Yes, Quatre."

Quatre sighed, "well, you _were_ angry... I guess this one can slide." Then the Arabian smiled, "by the way, welcome home."

"... Hn."

* * *

Phew, okay... all done. My wrist hurts O.o; 11 pages? Geez, I thought it was more. Uhh, I might get back into this. It'll get better, I promise.


	9. Left Hanging

Disclaimer: as usual, GundamWing and its characters aren't mine.

Warnings: language... and that's it. Oh yeah, weird attempts at humor. It was late, and usually under those circumstances, I laugh at anything. Sooo, yeah... anyways, heh. A somewhat long chapter. Oh yeah, possible spelling errors. Just a heads up.

PS, thanks for the patience and reviews, DeathsDragon, Sakura Harusame, and Keiran. They really, really mean a lot to me, heh. Nice and encouraging, and I appreciate it, so thanks again.

* * *

"Mexican food...?!" Wufei choked out. "I can't stand mexican food! What on Earth was Winner thinking getting mexican food! Does he not remember!? Does he lack the capacity to recall traumatizing experiences?! What is the matter with him..?!"

Trowa ignored the Chinese pilot's ranting, as he unwrapped a soft taco, and reached for a small container of guacamole.

"Keep that away!" Wufei suddenly barked.

Trowa blinked, looking at Wufei, the guacamole, then back at Wufei again. "And what seems to be the problem?" he asked, a little bored.

"Perhaps you don't remember the last time we had mexican food!" Wufei yelled.

Trowa blinked again, "uh, not entirely, no... enlighten me." He smiled faintly, lowering the small container, resting his chin in his hand, and watched his comrade expectantly.

"Flying sour cream!" Wufei cried, waving his arms. "Soaring salsa! Killer Quesadillas! Air-borne guacamole! Cracked taco shells! Lettuce and tomatoes with no where to go but _down_..!" Wufei dashed around the table, and grabbed Trowa, shaking him around again. "BURRITO BOMBS!!!"

Trowa anime sweatdropped, as Wufei fell to his knees beside his chair. With a sigh, Pilot 03 patted the younger's teen's shoulders lightly in comfort. "Hey, calm down... relax, will... will you just calm down...?"

"They still haunt me!" Wufei practically wailed. "They haunt me in my dreams! And _him_! His crazed maniacal grin _still_ plague my thoughts as I lay in bed at night! Those tacos, burritos, and quesadillas! I can _still_ see them! The sour cream! The salsa! I can still _feel_ them!!!" As he spoke, Wufei crawled up into Trowa's lap, curling up in a fetal position.

Trowa pursed his lips, and continued to lightly pat the younger pilot's shoulder. "Relax, Wufei," he said, softly. "Duo's not here, so don't worry. There will be no flying sour cream, soaring salsa, killer quesadillas, air-borne guacamole... and most definitely, definitely no burrito bombs, alright?"

Wufei whimpered, "promise?"

Trowa nodded, "yes... see, no Duo...?" he said, gesturing around the empty dining room. Then the pilot anime sweatdropped, noticing that Wufei was in his lap, and he was holding said pilot like a child. He grimaced, and shook his head. Wufei was crazy.

... But then again, they all were.

"Wufei... get down, and go eat..." Trowa said, turning slightly, so as to shove Wufei out of his lap, properly.

"Hey...!" Wufei hit the floor with a dull thump.

**oooXXXooo**

"Here we go, Hilde..." Duo was saying cheerfully, as he lead Hilde to the mansion's front door. "Home sweet home... how're you feeling?" His arm was draped casually around the small girl's shoulders in a comforting manner.

Hilde sighed happily, her arms still wrapped firmly around Duo's waist, as she nuzzled against him. "All better..." she chirped.

"That's good... I guess you just needed some time away from all the testosterone, huh?" Duo smiled good-naturedly.

Hilde frowned inwardly, but nodded anyway.

"Tadaima..!" Duo called, once they were inside. He paused, hearing loud footsteps thundering towards the main hall, where he and Hilde stood. Duo could only look around in very deep confusion. "Hello?"

"Duo!"

Duo looked up, then he brightened, "hey, Hee-chan!" he greeted. "When did you get back?" he asked. He failed to notice the very cold deathglare aimed at the small girl under Duo's arm.

Heero stalked down the stairs, then pointed at Hilde. "You...!" he hissed. "Get your filthy stinkin hands off of him, right now!"

"Make me..." Hilde sneered, and stuck her tongue out at him.

"Easy enough..." Heero growled, stomping closer. "It'll just require ripping both of your arms out of their sockets!"

Duo anime sweatdropped, and turned a bit, pushing Hilde behind him. "Hey, easy Hee-chan... Hilde's not exactly doin too hot these days..."

Heero stared at Duo, stunned. "You're protecting her?!"

"Uhhhh... well, yeah..."

Heero clutched at his chest, eyes widening further. "Why not just shoot me in the heart?! Why not just stick a knife in my chest?! Why not just kill me here and now?!"

Duo sighed, "Hee-chan, don't be like that..." he said, gently resting his free hand against Heero's shoulder. Then he leaned closer, "she's not exactly stable upstairs... if you know what I mean?" he whispered.

"Duo... I heard that..." Hilde whined.

Duo cringed, "oi..." He shot Hilde his most charming smile. "Sorry, Hilde... heh..."

"Don't apologize to her!" Heero yelled. "I don't care how insane she is, she has no right to use your compassion like this! You're mine now! And you damn well know it, Duo!"

"Hee-chan..." Duo blushed darkly.

Heero practically tore between Duo and Hilde, roughly shoving the girl away, while hugging Duo firmly. Of course the reaction from Hilde wasn't to be expected. She began stomping up and down, screeching incoherently. The only words that could be caught were "meanie", "greedy", and, oddly enough, "the".

Finally, Hilde sputtered violently. She went still, as Heero and Duo both stared at her, eyebrows raised, and lips tilted a bit in confusion. The girl then forced herself to take a breath.

"... I said..." she said in a slow, deliberate tone. "That I would like to challenge the mighty Heero Yuy for Duo Maxwell's affections..."

Duo's jaw dropped, "whaat..?!" he squawked. "Hilde! You're not yourself right now! You have any idea what you just said?!"

"Yes..." Hilde sniffed.

Heero growled low in his throat, and tightened his hold on Duo.

"You wanna challenge Heero..?!" Duo yelled, waving his arms frantically. "He'll throttle you! He's strangle you! He'll shoot you! He'll stomp all over you! He'll kill you! He'll massacre you! He'll hurt you to _death_!!!"

Hilde anime sweatdropped, "it's so nice to know I have friends who have faith in me."

Duo blinked, then drooped forward, hanging in Heero's arms. "Oi vey..." he groaned.

Heero was grinning. He was grinning madly. He was grinning like any insane man who was just given a huge vote of confidence that encouraged violence.

"Trowa! Wufei!" the Japanese pilot barked.

Suddenly both pilots appeared, behind Heero, saluting. "Sir?!" they replied, crisply. Duo glared at them.

"Will you guys knock it off? You're only encouraging all this!"

Trowa smirked slightly, "as did you, Duo dearest..." he purred. "May I quote? 'He'll throttle you! He's strangle you! He'll shoot you! He'll stomp all over you! He'll kill you! He'll massacre you! He'll hurt you to _death_!!!'..."

Heero bristled at the 'Duo dearest', but with great effort, he managed to let it slide.

Meanwhile, Wufei almost snickered, as Duo glowered at Trowa. "Shut up... I was panicking...! Save Hilde, she's nuts! She doesn't stand a chance!"

"Duo, I'm not insane!" Hilde called, exasperated.

"Wha...?" Duo blinked, turning to look at Hilde, while still dangling in Heero's arms.

Hilde lightly rapped her knuckles against her head. "I'm all here... I'm not crazy, alright? I just wanted some time for ourselves... that's all."

"Hilde! How could you?!" Duo demanded.

"Those two idiots were bugging me!" Hilde yelled, pointing at Trowa and Wufei. "They kept flirting with you! It was annoying, because I'm supposed to have you!"

"What?!" Duo squawked again.

Heero turned, glaring viciously at Trowa and Wufei. "What the hell were you guys doing with Duo?!"

"Nothing!" they both blurted out, hastily.

"Hn...!" Heero lifted Duo back to his feet, and gently pushed him towards Trowa and Wufei. "Take care of Duo, get him out of the way... I'll handle you guys afterwards, but right now..." he aimed his icy gaze back to Hilde. "_She_ is my objective..."

Hilde smirked, almost menacingly, while Heero narrowed his eyes.

"Omae o korosu..."

Rather than deny Heero anything, Trowa and Wufei nodded, each grabbing one of Duo's arms, and raced away hastily, the American in tow. Of course there was another huge sense of deja vu for the trio.

**oooXXXooo**

"What're you guys doing?!" Duo shouted, strugging with the ropes. His wrists were bound together, and now his arms were being tied down?! Where was the logic in that?!

"Sorry, Duo..." Wufei said, simply. "Yuy says to get you out of the way, sooo..."

"Tying me up doesn't get me out of the way!" Duo hollered.

"I beg to differ..." Wufei responded, easily. He leaned over, looking downstairs from the railing. "Barton, finished?"

"Yeah... it should be able to hold him..." Trowa called upstairs. "Toss me your end."

Wufei nodded, tying the rope, leaving a long tail. Then he stood up, and calmly tossed the end down to Trowa, giving him plenty of slack. Trowa whistled, as he flicked the rope, hooking it on the chandelier that hung over the foyer.

"Guys... I'm not sure I approve of all this..." Quatre said, slowly.

"Yes! Thank you, Cat! See?! You're both insane! Insane!" Duo kicked around violently. "Wu-chan! Untie me! Don't make me go Shinigami on your ass!"

"Shush, Duo..." Wufei said, with a soothing smile, as he stroked Duo's hair gently. "Everything will be okay."

Duo felt very uneasy at the moment, as he fidgeted, and tried to shift away a bit. Wufei continued to smile that weird smile, as he slipped one arm behind Duo's back, and the other under his knees, and lifted the braided boy up, bridal style.

"... Wu-chan...?" Duo gulped.

"Guys... please, I don't think this will help at all... I mean Heero won't approve of this, since it's Duo that you're putting in danger, and..." Quatre tried again, but couldn't help but step back a bit.

And the Arabian's words were ignored, as Wufei closed his eyes, still smiling serenely. "Barton?" he called, curiously.

"Got it..." Trowa called back, cheerfully.

Wufei nodded. And without another word, tossed Duo over the railing.

Quatre cringed.

"Auuuuughhhh!" Duo shouted, until he felt definite weight keeping him from hitting the floor below. Slowly opening his eyes, Duo looked down, seeing that Trowa was hauling him upwards. Duo looked up, eyes widening. He was tied to the damn chandelier!

"You idiots! You're driving me insane!"

"Ah, so you can join the club..." Trowa called, as he tied the end of the rope to the banister, to keep Duo very high above the floor.

Wufei leaned against the railing, with a grin, "well, that was fun... as long as you're out of the way now..."

"Cat!" Duo yelled, struggling. "I'm ordering you to kill Tro-kun, and Wu-chan for me! I now dub thee, Cat, as Shinigami's Underling! So, sic 'em, Cat!!!" the braided teen wailed, kicking and swinging around.

Quatre sighed, "I'm sorry, Duo... I can't..."

"Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat...! Where's the love?!" Duo whined.

"I'm sorry, Duo... maybe this is for the best, I mean... it's possible Heero and Hilde are only fighting over you because you're witnessing the whole thing... people are weird that way."

"Not fair, not fair, not fair...!" Duo kicked more violently, which only caused him to begin spinning slowly. "There is absolutely no logic in this whole stupid scenario!"

Trowa tried not to laugh, as he looked up at Wufei, "so, shall we go watch the festivities..? They're in the back."

Wufei sighed, "it's not Relena being killed..." he practically complained. "But I suppose watching Yuy kill any weak onna is better than nothing..." With that, he straightened up, grabbing Quatre's shirt tightly, and walked downstairs, the little Arabian helplessly trailing along.

And they all headed out to watch the show, literally leaving Duo Maxwell hanging.

**oooXXXooo**

"Why the hell are you using my weapons?!" Wufei shouted, angrily. "Just shoot her! You have a gun, you know how to use it! You aim, and pull the trigger! Why use my katanas?! Have you no respect for other people's belongings?!"

"Shut up, Chang...!" Heero snapped. "I _do_ have some honor... the stupid girl has terrible aim, it wouldn't be fair!"

"Fair?" Trowa said, slowly. "Who cares about fair?!" he yelled, waving his arms in agitation. "You weren't fair with us! You kept trying to shoot us whenever the opportunity came up! Or even when there was no opportunity at all!"

"Both of you just shut up! I still have to take care of the two of you, remember?" Heero snarled.

Trowa and Wufei anime sweatdropped, shut their mouths, and dived behind Quatre for protection. Quatre rolled his eyes.

Pilot 01 turned back to his opponent. "Alright, you cow!" Heero hollered, as he swung Wufei's katana wildly. "Prepare to be smitten!"

The spectators anime sweatdropped, though Hilde continued to glare defiantly at the Japanese pilot.

Pursing his lips, Trowa stepped out from behind Quatre, and took a few steps towards Heero. "Uhhh, Heero?"

"Hn..." Heero grunted, eyeing Hilde furiously.

"... Smitten?" Trowa questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Heero blinked, then scowled at the taller pilot. "Yes, smitten..."

"Uh, I don't think that's the word you mean."

Heero blinked again, "what?"

Then Quatre walked up, and stood with Trowa, near Heero. "Smitten doesn't sound like the proper term, Heero..."

"Of course it's the proper term..." Heero retorted. "It's the past-tense for smite, is it not?"

Trowa and Quatre looked at each other, confused. Then shrugged, as they thought on that.

Then Quatre laughed slightly, "heh... wow, I... I never really thought about this before... Smite, present tense... I-I don't think there is a past-tense for smite, actually..."

Trowa blinked, then sighed, "All words have a past-tense, Quatre... like 'jamp'."

Quatre anime sweatdropped, "and _what_ is 'jamp'?"

"Past-tense for 'jump'..."

Quatre stared at Trowa, blankly. Then the older pilot actually smiled a little brightly, which was a little strange to see on the normally silent pilot.

"Trowa, the past-tense for 'jump' is 'jumped'," Quatre pointed out.

"I'm pretty sure it's 'jamp', Quatre..." Trowa replied, patiently.

"There is no such word, Barton..." Wufei snorted, as he joined the trio.

"Why not ask Wufei?" Quatre suggested, "he's a scholar."

Wufei blinked, "I am?" Then he anime sweatdropped, as Heero, Quatre, and Trowa all gave him a pointed glare. Scratching his head a little uncertainly, he shrugged, "alright then... what are you asking?"

Quatre pointed at Heero, "he told Hilde, 'prepare to be smitten'..."

"Is it not the proper term?" Heero asked, with a roll of his eyes.

"...." Wufei furrowed his brow, thoughtfully.

"Come on, Wufei... you should know this... you say stuff like that all the time," Trowa said, smirking faintly.

Wufei frowned, "I do not."

"Yes you do, don't deny it..." Trowa snickered. "'_I shall smite thee_!'" the taller pilot said in a dramatic tone, holding both hands above his head, as if holding a sword. "Ring a bell?"

Wufei stared at Trowa as if he were crazy. "I shall smite thee?" he echoed. "I have never said anything of the sort..!"

Trowa blinked, "really?" He tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Hm, must have been someone else... but he sure did sound like you... dubbing himself the Blue Thunder..."**1**

"Guys, focus..." Quatre cut in, with a small smile. Then he turned to Wufei, "so?"

"I don't think 'smitten' is the right word..." Wufei answered.

Heero frowned, "why not... it's past-tense, isn't it?"

"It just doesn't sound right..." Wufei replied, calmly.

"How does it not sound right?!"

"Listen to it! 'Prepare to be smitten!'? I mean, come on... it sounds foolish!"

"... _You're_ foolish..." Heero muttered.

Wufei glared at him, "what was that?"

"... I said, 'cows are hoofish'," Heero said, smiling innocently.

Trowa and Quatre anime sweatdropped, then visibly shuddered at the strange sight of the stoic, homicidal pilot looking so... _sweet_.

"No you didn't!" Wufei snapped.

"Yes I did!"

"Liar! You said something else! Now what did you say?!"

"I said 'cows are hoofish'!"

"You did not! You don't say ridiculously random things like Duo!"

Trowa sighed, resting his hand against his face in obvious exasperation, while Quatre stared at the argument, a little dumbfounded.

"Excuse me!" Hilde shouted, managing to regain the pilots' attention. "I believe that bastard and I were about to start a duel..."

"What bastard?" the pilots asked.

"That one..." Hilde pointed at Heero with 'her' katana.

"Who're you calling a 'bastard'...?!" Heero shouted.

"I just said... _'you'_..." Hilde replied, looking bored. She crossed one ankle over the other, placing one hand on her hip, and proceeded to tap her own katana against her shoulder. "Well? Shall we get on with it?"

"You stupid schmuck of a woman..." Heero growled.

"Again with the 'schmuck'..." Trowa said, shaking his head. "Where on Earth did he learn such a word...?"

"Who knows?" Wufei and Quatre muttered, with a sigh.

* * *

**1** yeah... VA humor of sorts. I dunno, Wufei saying Kuno's lines always seemed funny to me XD

Welp, that's it... Almost 9 pages, yay? Oi, action. I dunno, I doubt I'll go that far. Just can't do action, it's sad when I try, really. So, uhhhh... how're you?

Oh yeah, about 'Jamp', it just became a word around here. So now I'm curious if everyone says it. It's like, "he jamp over the puddle." Just had to ask. Heh.


End file.
